A Cupid's Quarrel
by Gooniegirl3333
Summary: One determined CSI, two new lab techs, and... Jesse's ghost? Anything is possible in this dramatic sequel to "Stupid Cupid." You thought the games were over, but they've only just begun.
1. I Can Dream About You

**SPOILER WARNING FOR ANY UK READERS (who have NOT seen the newest season yet): This fanfic will contain many episodes of the second half of season 9. READ AT YOUR RISK.**

**A/N:** Welcome, one and all, to the sequel of "Stupid Cupid"! I'm so sorry for making you wait this long, but I was terrified about even attempting this story. Anyway...

I have the entire story mapped out, but this does NOT mean I won't take any input from you wonderful people. This fic will take place over the rest of season 9 (starting just before "Last Stand" and ending at, dun dun dun, "Mayday.") I guess you can consider it a countdown. It's more dramatic than action-packed and will be EXTREMELY RAINY...

So, without further ado, I present:

_A Cupid's Quarrel_

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><p><strong>Chapter 1: I Can Dream About You<strong>

He was rushing, barely giving his lungs the chance to inflate. Who could blame him? He had made a mistake, the biggest mistake of his life. He had to tell her. No, he needed to tell her.

Ryan Wolfe needed to tell Natalia Boa Vista that he loved her.

It was that simple.

Flying up the stairs of the building, taking two steps at a time, Ryan finally reached the entrance door to the lab. The door swung open dramatically, much like this moment. Without much thought or realization of an audience, the male CSI dashed to her lab room, DNA, and grabbed Natalia by the hips.

"Ryan! What the-?" she exclaimed, a test tube leaving the grip of her delicate fingers to meet the floor. She had no chance to finish her thought as Ryan pressed his lips against hers passionately. Natalia gave into the embrace, her hands grasping around his neck.

"Natalia Boa Vista, I love you," Ryan proclaimed. Natalia's eyes widened sweetly. "I know I should have admitted that before, but I'm doing it now."

"I love you, too," she replied just as loving.

"But that's not all," he gulped, attempting to regain the confidence he had seconds before. "I, uh. I wrote the original letters."

It was that moment Ryan became aware of his surroundings. The walls caved in and faded off while Natalia's expression shifted into hurt.

"What?" the brunette whispered. "You did what?"

"I wrote the love letters," Ryan confessed again as he watched the room dissolve around them.

"The entire time I thought I was being harassed by a maniac, it was just you?" Natalia yelled and stepped back in fear.

"No, I mean," he hesitated. "I-."

"I can't believe you let me go through all of that!" She continued to yell and step backwards, betrayal etched in her eyes. "Stay away from me!"

"Natalia!" he shouted out. _"Natalia!"_

Quickly, Ryan's body shot up from his slumber. The sweat dripped from his brows, his eyes closing at their own will.

"My conscience is trying to tell me something," he stated breathlessly. "Keep that in mind." Peering over at the alarm clock near his bed, he noticed the time dolefully. It was three in the morning. Ryan knew he wouldn't be able to fall back to sleep until he calmed his nerves. With little energy in his body, the CSI groggily pulled himself out of bed and headed to his kitchen.

The fridge door, at first, wouldn't budge. Ryan winced, realizing he was using his right arm. The pain shot from his healing gun wound near his lower, right torso to the length of his normally muscular body. He couldn't wait to get back to the gym, but Doctor's orders suggested otherwise for an indefinite time.

He grabbed for the door again, this time with his left hand. It opened easily, but little suited his appetite, the usual reaction he had been getting nowadays. Nothing had seemed appealing since he returned home from the hospital; Ryan blamed it on boredom. He was ready to get back to work, the cases, his friends…

Natalia? Maybe. He still wasn't sure. The brunette visited him in the hospital the following day after being held overnight for low blood sugar observation. He promised himself the moment he returned home, he would devise some plan, any plan, to fix this mess he created.

So far, Ryan still had nothing. This idea of walking into war with no strategy whatsoever kept him up at night.

He grumbled lowly. Not a single item in his fridge looked good… still.

_Back to bed, I guess…_

Closing the door, Ryan jumped suddenly as he attempted to contain his screaming.

"Hey, Wolfe," the man announced with a snarky grin as he appeared from behind the closing refrigerator door.

"Jesse?" Ryan questioned, his hand to his heart. "What are you doing here?" He stopped himself short of continuing that previous thought. _Jesse is dead Wolfe_, Ryan remembered. _What the hell?_ "Are you haunting me or something?" Ryan carefully probed.

"If that's what you want to call it," the former CSI joked, chuckling at Ryan's exasperated reaction. "You left in hurry last time, Wolfe," Jesse scorned. "And I'm going to assume you ignored everything Speed and I advised you to do."

"You know, for being dead," Ryan quipped, "you're not very quick." He walked away hastily, hoping to jump back into bed and lose sight of the ghoul.

Jesse appeared and blocked the staircase, a smile placed pleasantly upon his face.

"Okay, I take that back," Ryan mumbled. "What do you what?"

"I... well, we want you to realize the mistake you're making," Jesse stated, an eyebrow arched disdainfully. "You are only going to push Natalia away."

"Yeah, that's kind of the point, Cardoza," Ryan sneered as he glanced behind the male, contemplating some sort of escape from this unnecessary conversation. "Now, can I go to bed?" He attempted to maneuver around Jesse, but the determined spirit blocked him.

"It's not the kind of pushing away you'll want, Wolfe." He sighed disappointedly. It was obvious his words weren't getting through. "Just… don't do anything you'll regret."

"I know what I'm doing," Ryan retorted as he crossed his arms against his chest. Truth was, he had no idea what he was doing. But he wasn't going to admit that to anyone; not to Jesse, Natalia, or even himself.

"Fine," Jesse grumbled. "It's time to wake up."

"Huh?" Ryan shot back, confused.

"_Wake up!"_

His sleep was broken by his cell phone buzzing in his right ear. Ryan rubbed his heavy-set eyes vigorously, laying in the comfort of his own bed.

It was February 17, his first day back to work since being shot. Three grueling days were spent resting and not at the lab catching criminals. Ryan hated his days off to begin with; being forced into sitting and doing nothing pushed him close to crazy.

The cell continued to buzz. Maybe he should answer the call.

Quickly, Ryan blindingly grabbed the phone, barely muttering a greeting into the speaker.

"Ryan?" questioned a jolly voice that giggled a bit.

"Natalia!" he exclaimed. "Hey, what's going on?" Okay, so maybe he wouldn't begin "Operation Deviate" just yet. _God, that voice_, he thought spiritedly. _Well, I wouldn't mind waking up to it every day… wait, no. Remember: you are doing this for her._

_You value your friendship more than a broken heart._

_Wait, isn't she still talking?_

"Ryan? Are you even listening?" Natalia probed suspiciously.

"Yeah, sorry," he apologized, feeling rather foolish. "What were you saying?"

"I was asking if you need a ride to work," she hesitated, "you know, considering what happened to your car… and, well…" Her voice drifted off, embarrassment setting in as they both recalled last week.

"No, it's fine," Ryan sputtered out a little too shortly. "I, uh… I have a rental until I get the car situation figured out." He smirked subconsciously, realizing the brunette couldn't see it.

Natalia could hear it, though, and mirrored the grin.

"Okay," she stated. "I guess I'll see you at the lab."

As they exchanged quick "goodbye's," Jesse's voice echoed in Ryan mind.

_Don't do anything you'll regret…_

"I know what I'm doing!" Ryan shouted at the top of his lungs. _I think…_

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><p><strong>AN:** Alright, there you have it... a stubborn Ryan story, =). To me, this beginning DOES feel a little rushed, but I was desperate to post it for you guys. I promise to get it all written up in the next 2 weeks because the moment school starts back up, I won't have any time to myself to type, =(.


	2. If I Could Turn Back Time

**A/N:** Gasp! So sorry! I meant to finish and post this last week. But life got ahead of me. However, I totally promise to put time aside this weekend and ALL of next week to get ahead on writing this (Aug 22: school starts and I won't have time to myself that much.)

Anyway, thank you for the wonderful reviews. And to those silent reviewers, don't hesitate to tell me what you like/don't like about this story. Thank you!

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><p><strong><span>Chapter 2- If I Could Turn Back Time<span>**

Ryan didn't like this elevator. Nothing good ever came out of coming up this elevator by himself. If it was up to him, he would have taken the stairs.

_No strenuous activities_, the doctor ordered.

The metal frame creaked its soundtrack around him. Now was not the time to develop claustrophobia, though that logic didn't stop the CSI from imagining the lift's supports giving in and him falling to his death.

_Would be better than what lies ahead… or above._

The red-lighted numbers increased.

_Ugh, this is insane!_ Ryan thought. _This whole situation is not that big of a deal. Soon it will all blow over, and everything will go back to normal._

The doors slowly rolled open. Ryan held his breath and stepped out.

His eyes peered around the lab. Everything seemed relatively normal; the hustle and bustle of technicians and CSIs alike created a kind of hectic portrait before him.

He missed this, if only for the three days.

"Wolfe!" exclaimed a husky voice from down the hall. The giant of a CSI scurried down to greet Ryan, a hand gestured out. "What's up?" The hands clasped together smoothly as both men smiled.

"Nothing much, man," Ryan stated joyfully. "Just ready to get back to work."

"Well, the lab hasn't been the same without you," Walter insisted.

"Yeah, I bet Delko's had a blast," he joked back.

"Haha, Wolfe," Eric chuckled sarcastically, a heavy hand settling atop Ryan's shoulder from behind. Calleigh tagged merrily by the Cuban's side before carefully embracing Ryan in a loving hug.

"How are you sweety?" she asked in her pleasant Southern twain.

"I'm good. Thanks. Just really ready to get back to work," Ryan grinned.

"Well, H wanted to see you the moment you got in," Delko mentioned with a cunning smile. It was probably nothing in reality. Horatio just wanted to check up on the CSI and lay down some ground rules until he was fully healed. Though, that didn't stop Delko from a little fun. "Oh, and Natalia is in the DNA lab." His smile increased, the other colleagues joining in.

Ryan rolled his eyes at this. _Really?_ he thought. _I'm not back for more than five minutes, and we are already starting this?_

"Thanks," he dully stated and left the three to their silly grinning.

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><p>The CSI tapped lightly on the Lieutenant's door and popped his head through the opening.<p>

"H? You wanted to see me?" he questioned, his eyes darting behind him. Ryan had carefully made his way past the DNA lab before Natalia could stop him. Luckily, her head was buried deep in an experiment.

He just wasn't ready yet.

"Mr. Wolfe," Horatio smiled, "welcome back. Have a seat." He gestured to the chair in front of his desk so they could be eye to eye. "How are you feeling?"

"Feeling great!" Ryan exclaimed proudly. Granted the answer was a little over the top, but he didn't want anyone to think he was damaged goods, not even Horatio. "Just ready to get back to catching criminals, solving cases; you know, the usual."

"Slow down," the Lieutenant chuckled. "First things first. I know your doctor hasn't released you for any physical activities just yet."

"Unfortunately, no," Ryan sighed, brushing a hand through his pristine hair. "But I don't intend to let that slow me down."

"Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but IAB is requiring psych consultation now." Ryan's eyes suddenly widened at this and began to protest, Horatio throwing up a hand to stop him. "It's a precautionary policy. Internal Affairs believes it's now necessary when cops are shot in the line of duty or personally involved in a case… and in your situation, that would be both."

"H, that's total bullshit!" Ryan argued and pounded a fist against the arm rest. Taking a deep breath, he cooled his nerves. Getting upset wasn't going to help. "I don't need or even have the time to talk to someone about my 'feelings'." His brows scrunched determinedly, hoping the father-like boss would agree. "I'm sure you could put in a few words; get them to change their minds."

"I'm sorry, but I'm going to agree with IAB," Horatio stated firmly.

_Agree?_ Ryan was taken aback. _What is going on?_

"I've been neglecting you and the rest of the team," Horatio admitted somberly and lowered his eyes a bit. His fingers fiddled with the sunglasses in front of him. "I really need everyone at their best, physically and mentally, but I don't think I've done anything to satisfy that."

"You're joking, right?" Ryan questioned, his body leaning forward as he attempted to keep his anger and feeling of betrayal hidden. "I'm fine, really. I don't need any damned shrink to tell me that."

"My order stands, Mr. Wolfe." The red-head brought his eyes back up and noticed the CSI's changed appearance in attitude. "Ryan, you were shot and drugged by an officer of the law… in your own home. You act like it was nothing."

"But it **was** **nothing**, really."

"I take it you haven't been truthful to Ms. Boa Vista about your total involvement?"

Silence ensued as if the room's oxygen escaped in one swift move.

"So, wait," Ryan retorted, "is this some sort of punishment? For sending her the gifts?" He was almost fuming by now.

"No," Horatio growled, his eyes bearing down on the younger CSI. "As your boss, I know it's none of my concern."

"You're right, H. It isn't," Ryan stated boldly under his breath, hoping his sincerity wasn't mistaken for rudeness.

"But as your friend, I hope that you can be honest with her," Horatio sadly pleaded. "Being undercover, I never had that chance, and look at the years I lost with Kyle because of it."

The younger CSI sighed heavily and stood, suddenly feeling uncomfortable at the familiarity of this moment.

"Is that all?" Ryan asked.

"I have you scheduled later today with the department psychologist," Horatio shot back in a professional tone. It was obvious the young man wasn't ready to listen just yet. "Until then, lab work only. Nothing in the field."

"Fine," Ryan spat and marched out the door…

… into Natalia.

A sound of small surprise escaped each others' lips as the two grabbed for the other's shoulder or hand.

"God, Talia, I'm sorry," Ryan apologized, the two gaining their balance and chuckling lightly.

"No, Ryan," Natalia giggled back with bright eyes. "I should have been looking where I was going." She peered behind the man into Horatio's office and rolled her eyes. "I take it he gave you the same speech?"

"About needing the team at their best?" he questioned. "Pretty much. And I now I have to go see some shrink? This is unbelievable."

"Tell me about it!" Natalia exclaimed. The two began to meander down the lab hall together, both smiling.

Ryan liked this; there was an ease to the bantering and conversation, as if time had jumped back before he started this mess.

"Is there anything I missed while I was gone?" he asked with intrigue. The brown-haired man smile and pointed his eyes towards Calleigh and Eric still standing near the elevator before going separate ways. "When I arrived, they seemed pretty joined at the hip."

"Oh, that?" Natalia huffed. "That's old news. There's already new gossip stirring within the lab."

"Really? About what?" Ryan asked, even more interested than before. _Hell, any new gossip to take the heat off of me would be a blessing._

"Unfortunately, about me," she blushed awkwardly. "Apparently word got out about Chad's confession; you know, about the original letters **not **coming from him? Well, now everyone is determined to find out who my original secret admirer was."

Okay, so that was lie. Chad's interrogation was strictly on a need-to-know basis within the team. Any details that leaked out about the CSI-involved case could jeopardize the team's jobs or safety.

But that didn't stop Natalia from having just a **little bit** of fun. She was definitely entitled to it.

That's what she kept telling herself, at least.

"Really?" Ryan gulped. _Everyone? Damn it._ "I think maybe 'everyone' needs to stay out of your business."

"And if they don't?" the brunette questioned. "What are you going to do about it?" _This could get interesting…_

"I…will… just have to start my own rumors," he hesitantly teased. "Save you from the embarrassment." He bolstered his chest up, eager to gain another _friendly_ smile from the female.

"Oh, my hero," she sweetly commented, grasping Ryan's forearm with a gentle touch. An engaging spark crept up the CSIs spines effortlessly. Natalia quickly patted the goosebump-ish skin and laughed as she let go.

"Alright, I better go find Calleigh," she stated with a continued smile. Slowly, she began to back away. "We're headed out to a call."

"Wait," Ryan called out, "you get to go out in the field?"

"Yup! Psychologist cleared me already!" With a single wave, the female CSI disappeared around the corner.

A returned wave eased into the rubbing of the male CSI's eyes. This day was clearly not in Ryan's favor.

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><p><strong>There you go!<strong>


	3. Once Bitten, Twice Shy

**A/N:** *facepalm* I'm sorry, everyone. Life completely got in the way. I'm trying super hard to put time aside to write this story, but my plan is failing! (Much like we hope Ryan's plan will fail, lol). Also, I know this seems a little slow right now (we are still on the first day back), but I promise for it to get really juicy very soon, like in the next chapter...

Thank you for all of your wonderful reviews! I try to reply back to every one of them, but that didn't work out this time. Hopefully, I'll have the chance with this chapter. Anyway, ENJOY!

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><p><strong><span>Chapter 3 – Once Bitten, Twice Shy<span>**

Two eyes studied meticulously over the documents before them. The CSI they belonged to had scrutinized over these images for months now, so much that he could see them in his sleep. Though, that didn't stop him from staring for hours on end.

Eric Delko was determined to find out who Calleigh Duquesne's new boyfriend was. Sure, to the uneducated eye, this scene would look like a jealous ex-boyfriend spying on the woman he still loves. However, these spectators would be completely and utterly wrong; Eric was just looking out for the beautiful blonde.

It was treacherous territory to be examining Calleigh's receipts in the layout room, but he had just received – more or less, stolen – new details from her… well, that location was privileged information.

Okay, so maybe he was a jealous ex, but love makes people do the craziest of things.

"_Love like family" my ass,_ he thought.

"Delko?"

"Huh?" The Cuban shot his head up in distraught and quickly slammed his palms against the papers on the table. "Wolfe!" he shrieked, "don't you know how to knock?" Ryan scrunched his brows confusedly, cocking his head to the side.

"You okay?" the younger CSI questioned carefully. Sighing, Eric slumped his shoulders over and eyed the receipts again. He was going to need to be sly about this.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Delko breathed, slowly grabbing each piece of paper and sliding them into a Manila envelope. "I'm just stressed about these convicts out on the loose," he lied.

True, he was worried heavily about Memmo's disappearing act, but Horatio, as a friend, ordered him to concentrate on something else and not about a situation he currently couldn't control.

Luckily for Eric Delko, his brother-in-law never specified what that "something else" should be.

"Do you need any help?" Ryan asked, inching his way closer to the anxious CSI. "According to Horatio, I have all the time in the world right now."

"No, no," Delko waved and moved the envelope farther away from Ryan. "I've got it taken care of." Clearing his throat, he attempted to change the subject. "So I take it your talk with Horatio didn't go that well?" Ryan grinded his teeth and rubbed the back of his neck.

"I've been ordered to psychiatric counseling," he answered bitterly, flailing his hands in the air. "Therapy, Delko! I haven't been to therapy in 2 years!" Placing his palms against the glass table before him, Ryan let out a heavy sigh. "Even then it wasn't an 'order'."

"Wow," Delko replied sheepishly, stuffing the evidential envelope into his back pocket. "That's not like H."

"No kidding. And I can't go out into the field until this head doctor clears me." He rocked his body away from the table to rub his brown hair maniacally. "And then I ran into Natalia, which I was really **not** ready for."

"Wolfe," Delko chuckled and shook his head, "why don't you just tell her? This whole thing could be over before it starts."

"But that's the problem, Delko," Ryan scorned, "I already **did** start this. I just need it to go back to the way everything was."

"You keep saying that, but have you even thought that **maybe** change could be a good thing?" Eric shrugged confusedly. _Why is this man making it so hard?_ "That maybe this is exactly what was supposed to happen between you and Natalia?"

"Getting harassed by a freak was supposed to happen?"

"Wolfe, that wasn't your fault!" Delko retorted with serious.

"So everyone says," Ryan grumbled. "Anyway, that doesn't matter. Was does matter is that I need to find away to get Natalia's mind off of the letters and on to something else."

Eric just shook his head disappointingly again. _A boulder could fall on him, and he wouldn't notice._

"Which is what I first came to ask you about," Ryan continued, purposely ignoring the Cuban's expression. "Natalia mentioned the letters to me... again." The CSI bit his lip and lowered his head, his eyes scanning the layout table. "The way she keeps bringing them up, you don't think maybe she knows, do you?"

"Knows what?" Delko quickly asked.

"That I sent... but who could have told her?" he tried to reason. "I mean, that information was part of the case."

"Yeah, about that..." Delko began slowly, "Natalia—"

Suddenly, Ryan tilted his head and stared at a piece of paper seizing his attention on the floor near Delko's slick boots.

"What's that?" Ryan interrupted, pointing to the free slip of paper. Delko's eyes peered down and widened hesitantly.

_Another receipt!_

"Oh! That's nothing," Delko lied with a small quiver, bending down to snatch the slip. He was too slow as Ryan clutched on to it.

"Is it from your case notes?" Ryan questioned, flipping the receipt over to stare at the check-out printed smoothly upon it. "Wait, Calleigh?" His eyes placidly rose, sizing up his now embarrassed friend who tore the paper away from Ryan's fingertips. "Why do you need Calleigh's receipt?"

"I said it was nothing!" he choked. Quickly, Eric stuffed it into the Manila envelope before hiding back into his pants pocket.

"You're pathetic," Ryan chuckled, his arms smoothly crossing his chest. "Here you are criticizing me about my feelings for Natalia when you can't even admit how crazy you are for Calleigh?"

"It's not the same, Wolfe!" Eric exclaimed.

"It's completely the same!" Ryan laughed. "Man, Speed was right. You are a complete idiot," he grumbled under his breath.

"What did you say?" Eric inquired, his stance now at attention. _He didn't just say what I thought he said?_

_Oh,_ Ryan thought, _take it back. Find some way to take it back._

"Nothing," Ryan grinned with a wave of the hand. "Forget it."

Eric's lips parted, ready to pry out of the young man just exactly what he meant when a beautiful accent broke the moment.

"Hey, boys," Calleigh sweetly greeted as always. "Natalia and I are heading out to a call." The blonde shot a cunning smile over to Eric before bringing her focus to Ryan. "I was wondering if you wanted to join us, Ryan."

"He can't," Eric interrupted. "He has to pass his mental first." _That's what you get for calling me pathetic._ And evil glare was returned to the CSI from Ryan.

"Yeah, afraid so," he conceded, "but Delko would love to join you. Hey, Delko, maybe she could help you with that case you're so involved in?"

"No!" Eric shot back to Ryan, "that's fine. Really." Bringing his eyes back to his love, he smiled gently. "I really do need to get this done myself."

"That's okay," she replied somberly. _I guess Operation "Love Letters" will have to wait…_ "Ryan, what does he mean by a 'mental'?" Ryan grinded his teeth once more.

_Is the word "mental" really necessary?_

"I've been ordered to therapy," he retorted, "by Horatio. Well, actually IAB ordered it, but H didn't seem too against it."

"I wouldn't doubt that," Calleigh answered quite bluntly. "The newest head at Affairs has been hammering down on the way Horatio handles the team."

"So?" Ryan shrugged. "Nothing different than when Stetler was here."

"No, Stetler was nothing, but you didn't hear any of this from me." Exhaling, Calleigh shot her hands to her hips. "Anyway, Natalia is waiting for me."

"Sorry," the men shrugged.

"It's okay," she chuckled, "I'll just have to find a suitable replacement."

With that, she turned on her heels, the blonde's hips swaying side to side as she disappeared through the lab halls. Eric's eyes watched closely, the movement swinging like a pendulum, Ryan sarcastically rolling his eyes.

"Like I said: pathetic." Ryan left in haste before his friend could rebut anything else. Calleigh's last words lingered in the back of his mind as he trailed to Questionable Documents.

"_Suitable Replacement." _

_That could work…_

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><p><strong>AN:** I hope you enjoyed it! Also, is anyone noticing the titles of the chapters? I hope so... =).


	4. Hard Habit to Break

**A/N:** A long chapter for waiting so patiently, =).

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><p><strong><span>Chapter 4 – Hard Habit to Break<span>**

_Replacement?_ Ryan wondered as he meandered through the lab halls. _But who could I get to take Natalia's mind off of me? _

_Dave? No, he's in a long term relationship with his high school sweetheart…_

_Travers? No, he's too busy going on random vacations…_

_Delko? … No. Never. I'm not that desperate. Not to mention the wrath from Calleigh I would suffer. But it needs to be someone from the lab. That way I can keep my eye on them in case anything…_

Ryan shook his head of that thought. Natalia was very well capable of taking care of herself.

_Hopefully she won't kill me for setting her up. She just about murdered Delko when he did the same thing._

His thoughts wandered back to Natalia's party that year, the night he noticed something growing between them. Ryan was completely aware that nothing would come from the date considering her mixed emotions from her and Delko's relationship.

_If only I had taken that as a sign…_

Sighing, Ryan decided now wasn't the time to worry about the past. _What was I doing again?_ Snapping his fingers, the CSI realized how far away he strolled from QD and maneuvered his body to its direction.

Ryan wanted to thank Cynthia for her work on the "Stupid Cupid" case. As small as it may have been, her determination between the two handwritings saved a huge amount of doubt he felt earlier coming from his co-workers.

_Maybe Natalia needs a new shopping friend? No_, he decided. A shopping friend could turn into a best friend; Ryan was her best friend, and nothing could change that.

"Cynthia?" Ryan called as he finally entered the QD room. The lights were dimmed, an inert quietness lingering. "Cynthia?" he tried again, rattling his knuckles against the glass door. "You home?"

"She's gone," a grisly voice behind him announced. Broad shoulders pushed their way past Ryan to enter the room. A flickering of lights blinded the CSI; the room definitely needed a re-model. "You have me instead," the blond-haired man stated, a stack of files and envelopes caressed by his muscular arms. He set the pile down gently, an almost impossible feat as it wobbled, threatening to crash to the ground below.

"Oh," Ryan whispered, his eyes lowering to the tiled floor. "Is she off for the day?"

"Off permanently." The man did not make eye contact with Ryan as he sifted through the huge pile before him. "Transferred closer to home." Finally, the male shifted his attention to Ryan. "I'm Jeffery," he greeted, a hand out to shake, "Adamson. But most people just call me Jay."

"Ryan Wolfe," the CSI returned. _I guess I could send a card,_ he mentally grumbled. "You like the lab so far?"

"Well," Jay chuckled as he looked back at the pile, "minus the massive amount of work that's been loaded onto my shoulders, everyone is amazing."

"It **is** one of Florida's best," Ryan boasted.

"Yeah, especially the ladies," Jay winked and turned back to his previous project.

_Ladies?_ Ryan raised his head to the ceiling, as if praying to the Heavens. "This is some kind of sign, right?"

"Huh?" Jay questioned, his head barely lifting to listen.

"Oh, nothing," Ryan chuckled and cleared his throat. "So, you like what you see with the female population, huh?"

"Yeah, I know we're here for the science," Jay replied, a bit embarrassed, "but the women in this lab do a wonder on the eyes."

"So I take it you met Natalia Boa Vista?"

_Wolfe, what are you doing?_ Jesse's voice breached through Ryan's subconsciousness. _Stop it._

"Boa Vista?" Jay inquired, his eyes rolling up to remember. "Ah, Natalia, yes. Beautiful smile." He grinned at the mental picture then scrunched his eyes curiously. "Why? Is she yours or something?"

"No, no!" Ryan laughed and waved his hands. "We're just friends, but—,"

_Wolfe, don't._ Jesse pleaded.

"I heard she just ended a nasty relationship-," Ryan lied.

_You're going to regret this!_ the ghost continued.

"And as her friend, I think maybe a night out on the town is exactly what she needs."

"You think?" Jay asked, his body leaning against a nearby table. "Then why don't you take her out?"

"Oh, we've been down that road," Ryan cunningly grimaced at the notion, "and, anyway, I heard she has a thing for blonds."

_Wolfe, you are completely insane_, Jesse appeared and paced the hall outside the door. "Why do I even haunt you if you won't listen to me?"

"Shut up," Ryan mumbled through the side of his mouth.

"Well," Jay began and scratched his head quizzically, "if you think so…"

"Oh, I know so," Ryan grinned, a menacing nod adding to his eagerness. Looking down at his watch, he noticed the time; his therapy appointment was in 10 minutes. "Listen, I gotta go, but think about what I said, okay?"

"Will do," Jay commented back, slightly enthusiastic.

Transferring in, Jay wasn't completely sure about starting this position with the kind of reputation the lab had. From what he heard, it was a close family of sorts, the kind that did whatever it took to protect each other (even if that act was illegal). As the new guy watched Ryan scurry away, he wondered if the rumors were just that—rumors.

After all, this guy seemed pretty nice.

Hell, why shouldn't he ask out a beautiful woman? Clapping his hands together and rubbing them tightly, Jay figured now was better than later. _Besides_, the blond thought looking back at the pile in disgust, _I could use a break._

In one swift move, Jay rushed out of the QD lab to find the brunette.

* * *

><p>"What was <strong>that<strong> back there?" Jesse nearly shrieked, his opaque body jumping measures of feet to keep up with the CSI.

"**That **was a plan underway," Ryan grinned. His legs barely dashed through lab techs who slowly paced through the hallway, their heads buried in folders and cases. "A surefire plan, in fact."

"How could you possibly know that?" Jesse scorned.

Ryan opened his mouth to answer, quickly stopping in his tracks.

"Okay, so I don't know. But it's a start!" the CSI announced proudly. Sighing, Ryan scratched his brow. "Look," he began, searching around and making sure no one was watching him, "if Jay asks Natalia out, she'll start to forget the fake love she **thinks** she has for me. Even if it doesn't work with Jay, Natalia can start to move on with her life." A fast as he halted, Ryan picked the pace back up again.

"It's not fake!" Jesse shouted after him.

* * *

><p>The tips of her heels tapped impatiently as she waited for the elevator to arrive. Calleigh Duquesne was never this late to a crime scene, but she was forced to wait for her partner. She and Natalia kept running circles around each other, one CSI having to answer some newbie's question, the other CSI getting called back for test results. All the while, Tom was already at the scene, calling every two minutes to see where the ladies were.<p>

The blonde grumbled beneath her breath. The two women were supposed to be there a half an hour ago, but instead they were left waiting in agony for the elevator to approach their level.

"You know," Natalia quietly chimed, "we could always take the stairs."

"It's too late for that decision," Calleigh muttered and stared down at her watch. "The moment we take the stairs, the elevator will be here already."

"Okay," Natalia giggled, "whatever you say."

A light wisp of air brushed behind them as Ryan came to Calleigh's side.

"Oh," he jumped, "are you two waiting as well?"

"Pretty much," Natalia smiled. "You going down to the garage level? You could join us."

"Uh, no," Ryan replied, his focus darting from the pair to the stairs nearby. Doctor's orders were the least on his mind. Besides, a little exercise couldn't hurt. "I'll leave you ladies to your **gossip**."

Quickly, Ryan hopped over to the stair entrance, banging into the door's handle awkwardly, and disappeared.

"Wow," Calleigh commented and rolled her eyes. "When are you going to tell him you know about the letters?"

"I'm not," Natalia stated bluntly, gaining a disdainful look from the blonde. She eagerly returned the expression. "It's not my place. When he wants to tell me, he will."

"So, you're just going to let this game continue until then?" Calleigh inquired, a subconscious hand placing itself upon a hip. "Why don't you just end this and tell him how you feel?"

"When are you going to tell Eric you still love him?" Natalia shot back.

Calleigh became silent. The brunette was right. Calleigh Duquesne was still madly in love with Eric Delko, but she could barely confess it to herself. In frustration, the female began banging on the button on the wall.

"Ugh! This old thing!" she shouted to the doors in front of her, causing Natalia to contain a pout of laughter.

_Go on_, Natalia thought, _change the subject._

A ding from the elevator finally sounded, Calleigh breathing a sigh of relief, and the female CSIs strolled in.

"Natalia!" bellowed a manly voice.

Looking up from her spot, Natalia scrunched her brows in confusion. It was the new guy from QD.

"Yes?" she questioned as he came closer to the doors and placed his hands against the sensors. "Jay, right?"

"Yeah," Jay mumbled. "Listen, I was wondering if you weren't doing anything after work, maybe you and I could grab a drink?"

The two women turned to each other, Calleigh's eyes widened. _Don't do it_, her eyes warned.

"Uh, sure!" Natalia replied in a surprised yet pleasant voice. "I get off at 7 tonight."

"Great," he chimed back, a smile bright and content etched across his face. "I'll meet you right here at 7." Stepping back, Jay proudly let the doors close. A hasty smack against Natalia's arm startled the brunette.

"What was that?" Calleigh barked disconcertedly.

"Hey, I have a life I need to live, right?" Natalia grinned. Setting down her kit, she leaned against the back of the lift and crossed her arms, achievement evident in her expression. "Besides, this might just be the way to get Ryan to confess."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** *sigh* So, they're gonna BOTH use Jay, lol.


	5. Who's Zooming Who?

**A/N:** Enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong><span>Chapter 5 – Who's Zooming Who?<span>**

The corridors to this level of the Crime Lab building felt cold, stuffy. The lights flickered in and out as Ryan took another tread against the mismatched tiled floor. For a moment, the CSI couldn't tell if he was meeting a psychologist or stepping into a thriller.

When Ryan found out the previous psychologist had retired, he cursed at his luck. Dr. Owens was a sweet man who he became accustomed to for events such as this. Now, he had to break in the new guy?

He looked to his left, lifting up the paper in his hand to match the room number he was given, B220.

B123… B127… B129, he still had a ways to go.

The CSI grabbed his side and rubbed it gently, cursing himself for ramming into that door handle with his wound. _Stupid move…_

As he continued down the hall, right hand against his torso, Ryan wondered why a new department psychologist would be forced into such a frugal location.

The clattering of junk sounded behind him, Ryan flinching anxiously. The cop could stare down the barrel of a gun and survive numerous explosions and fires, but dark, creepy – albeit sinister – places were the devil's work to him. His memories of the graveyard flooded back him.

_If even one zombie appears, I swear to God I'm running…_

Finally, after criss-crossing between forgotten boxes and around three separate corners, Ryan came to room B220. A rattling from his knuckles against the wooden door startled the static ambience around him.

"Come in!" shouted a confident voice. Slowly, Ryan pushed the door open, peering in carefully.

"Hello?" Ryan questioned, his voice cracking.

"Oh, Mr. Wolfe," the woman behind a desk chimed, her eyes peering up from her work. "Please, have a seat."

Ryan crept over to the chair across the wooden desk, carefully observing the doctor in front of him. Her short red hair sat gently above her shoulders, a wisp or two falling to her blue-framed glasses. Her smile was sweet and kind, the wrinkles of time barely present.

_She seems nice enough_, he thought. _Maybe this won't be so bad… maybe I can get out of it._

"You'll have to excuse the mess," she stated, her eyes back down to the file, "but my office wasn't ready yet." Smiling, the doctor looked around herself. "It's a little depressing, but it's better than outside in the Miami humidity."

Hastily, the doctor collected the papers spread across the table into the purple-tinted file, placing the items on another table behind her. "I'm Dr. Gallagher," she stated and brought her attention back to the CSI. "I want to assure you there's nothing to be worried about. Everything said here is confidential."

"I know," Ryan retorted. "This isn't my first rodeo with a psychologist."

"Really?" the doctor asked, intrigued, and began searching for Ryan's file. Once found, she opened the file to reveal a cluster of papers.

Ryan squinted his eyes, curious as to what the paperwork said about him. "Yeah, so I was hoping you could just sign off on this slip so I could get back to my job."

The doctor clicked her tongue, amused at how many times she had been brought this demand. "I'm not sure how Dr. Owens ran his sessions, Officer Wolfe," she chided, "but you're not getting out of therapy that easy."

"I wasn't—," he tensed.

"We're just going to see how this one goes, okay?" Gallagher affirmed.

Ryan nodded, his shoulders relaxing a little.

* * *

><p>The basketball slammed impressively against the back board, anger following not far behind it.<p>

"Careful, Wolfe," Walter chuckled, running after the renegade ball. "The basketball never did anything to you!"

"I just can't believe she wouldn't sign off!" Ryan shouted. The ocean breeze trailed in from the beach, the CSI's hair being caught up in the whirl as he placed his hands against his head. "I can't even do my damn job!"

"Well, did she say when you can go back out?" Walter asked as he bounced the ball. Quickly, he maneuvered around Ryan and performed a layout. Perfect shot.

"**If** I commit to three more appointments, then after my next session," Ryan answered as the ball trickled to his side. His breath heaving a bit, he lifted the ball to his eye sight and then peered around Walter to visualize his target.

"It could be worse," Walter reminded him.

"Yeah," Ryan agreed and began dribbling the ball. He shifted his weight side to side, counteracting any movement Walter might pull on him. "I could be in therapy **and** have Natalia know what I did." He shot around the tall man, swirling smoothly to position himself in front of the hoop.

Jesse blocked him. "That wouldn't be a bad thing," he assured Ryan.

Eyes wide, Ryan stopped and slightly shook his head. "Not now," he mumbled casually and shot for the hoop. Nothing but net.

"Jesse! My man," Walter declared, shuffling his tired legs up to the old friend. Both clasped hands then arms in a manly hug. Standing back, the two tall CSIs glared back at their friend. "Listen to the man, Wolfe."

Ryan stood still, his eyes darting back and forth confusedly. _Huh?_ "You can see him?" he questioned as he panted, his vision becoming a little blurry.

"Of course!" Walter stated confidently.

Gripping his sides, Ryan lifted a hand to protest. This was all becoming a little too much. "I need to sit down." He limped over to a nearby bench, his knees caving to the seat as he let his head collapse between his legs. A pounding force began to seep to his temporal lobes.

Both Jesse and Walter smirked and followed suit to the bench.

"Now," Walter continued, taking a seat near his workout bag, "what Cardoza has been trying to say but failing at is-,"

"Failing?" Jesse interrupted.

"Yes, failing," Walter retorted with a heavy nod. "You're wasting all of this energy making sure BV doesn't know. In reality, telling her will make yours **and** her life much easier."

"No," Ryan countered. "Telling 'Talia will only complicate things. Besides, what if she doesn't feel the same?"

"She already does feel it!" Jesse replied. "She was at your bed side-,"

"That's my point!" Standing up, Ryan paced the court, putting a distance away from the men. "She fell for her hero, not me!" he blatantly shouted.

"You know," Jesse scorned, his voice barely audible above the wind, "you have a lot of excuses for not being with her!"

"Really?" Walter inquired as he took a drink of his water. _Figures_, he chuckled.

"Yeah, this is probably number 5," Jesse joked.

"They're not excuses!" Ryan snapped.

The ghoul strolled closer to the brown-haired CSI. "Fine," he stated. "But that doesn't mean Natalia won't find out sooner or later."

Quietly, Walter joined the two. "That's if she doesn't know already."

"What?" Ryan barked. "Why? Did you say something to her?"

Suddenly, the floor below Ryan began to rock, his vision becoming blurrier by the moment. The basketball court vanished, but the ocean waves raised to envelope the CSI.

Looking up, Ryan noticed Walter was gone as well. Jesse remained standing, his stance apparently unaware of the earthquake around him.

"You should really have that checked out," Jesse insisted, pointing to Ryan's bottom right torso.

A shooting pain throbbed around Ryan's wound as he grasped for it, his knees buckling under him. _He screamed in agony as his head lowered to the floor._

Two eyes jolted open. They took in their surroundings, a living room.

"What?" Ryan questioned. It was his house. The television was still on, the sound to a low rumble. _I must have fallen asleep_, he thought. He cringed at the soreness of his muscles from sleeping on the couch then twitched at the feeling of a sharp pain.

He looked down and brought up his shirt. The wound seemed fine, just bruised from hitting it.

Ryan sighed, reaching for the remote control to turn off the television. In a couple of more hours, after a restful sleep, the day would finally be over.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Wow, that was a really long day (5 chapters!) Ryan's happy the day is over, the adventure is just beginning, lol.


	6. Say It Isn't So

**A/N:** Hey, loves! I had a nice relaxing Sunday. So, I figured I would write another chapter! Also, thank you for the reviews. You guys are brilliant!

This chapter takes place during 9x14, **Stoned Cold**.

* * *

><p><strong><span>Chapter 6: Say It Isn't So<span>**

The next couple of days went by relatively fast for Ryan Wolfe. His second session with Dr. Gallagher covered many issues, both good and bad:

"_Did you ever forgive the team for not coming to find you?"_

Ryan didn't know what to say. He never thought about their involvement with that case.

"_Have you come to terms with you relationship with Horatio?"_

Relationship? As in father and son? Once again, Ryan was at a loss of words. Sure, Horatio had put him in positions he didn't necessarily agree with, but it was his job to stand by his boss... right?

"_Is there anyone in your life you see as a confidant?"_

No, Ryan answered to that question. The time wasn't right.

Proceeding the appointment, Dr. Gallagher released Ryan to field duty again. This gained him much relief considering the team's next case: the reappearance of Memmo Fierro.

It probably wasn't the best idea, but Ryan unwaveringly assisted Horatio and Eric on the capture of the fugitive.

"_Wolfe," Eric quietly said as Horatio led Cesar Soto, Memmo's accomplice, away, "you're bleeding. You okay?"_

_Looking down, Ryan noticed he _was _bleeding – the bottom right of his torso, in fact. "Oh, it's nothing," he feigned. "I probably caught myself on something earlier."_

His wound was the least of his troubles, however. The continuing week, Calleigh, Eric, and even Walter were on his constant heels, sneaking in ways for him and Natalia to be alone together. He had been cunning enough. Excuse after excuse kept him out of the firing range, but he couldn't keep this up for long.

He was either going to have to confront Natalia or the matchmakers.

_Ah, _Ryan thought as he passed a window in the lab, _just the person I need to see. _

"Delko?" Ryan greeted into the break room that early February afternoon. "I know what you're trying to do."

Looking up from his newspaper only slightly, Eric chuckled. His legs shifted in the uncomfortable plastic seat. _We definitely need to look into the budget for better furniture._ "I have no idea what you're referring to, Wolfe," he mocked.

"Don't play stupid with me, Delko," Ryan spat. Looking around himself, he shut the door to the room then slammed the case files he was holding against the table. "Playing matchmaker? How high school can you guys get?"

"How high school can your attitude be?" Eric retaliated. He slammed the newspaper down just as cruel.

Crossing his arms in defense, Ryan cocked his head to the side in a huff. "Don't try to change this on to me!" Strutting around the circular coffee table, the brown-haired CSI brought up a hand. "I know what you're doing," he pointed. "It won't work."

"Really?" Eric scuffed, "and why not?"

"Because I am miles ahead of your little scheme," Ryan gloated. "You three think you're the only ones with a plan?"

"You finally have one?" Eric questioned, his brows scrunching curiously.

"Yup," Ryan answered bluntly. "Only difference between yours and mine? Mine will work."

"Or it might blow up in your face, Wolfe," Eric joked, his hands rising in defense. "Fair warning."

Ryan kept his eyes on Eric, the two staring each other down, as the younger CSI grabbed the files to head out. "Seriously, stay out of it."

Pulling out his cell, Eric pressed the speed dial and watched the younger man disappear. "Calleigh? Yeah, Wolfe might have something up his sleeve."

* * *

><p><em>Doubt that's going to stop them<em>, Ryan decided as he headed to trace. But now wasn't the time for that particular worry. He had a job to do – specifically, finding out what that fiber was on the morning's victim.

Walking in, he saw a strawberry blonde head peering emphatically into a microscope.

_God, these techs are changing every week..._

"Hi," Ryan interrupted, causing the girl to jump, her arm flailing and paperwork scattering to the floor. Both reached down in an instant to collect the flying items, Ryan's face clearly apologetic.

'Thank you," the girl stated gratuitously, Ryan quietly acknowledging. "I- I'm Molly," she stumbled, "I just transferred in from Tampa." Her eyes barely locked to his as the two scurried with the papers.

"Hi, Molly, I'm Ryan," he greeted cheerfully. Both stood to gather the papers, Ryan's smile matching Molly's nervous one. "Welcome to Miami-Dade." Staring down at the papers in his hands, he grinned at the printed words. "Huh? You have a fiber checklist?" _Takes one to know one, I guess._

Quickly, Molly snatched the papers away, embarrassed. "Uh, yeah-," she fumbled, "I have a lot of checklists. But please, don't tell anyone?" she implored, her eyes still darting from the man before her to the papers in her hand. "I heard there's a high turn-over rate in this lab, and I really don't want to get fired."

"Oh, no. That's great," Ryan beamed, "I mean, you're talking to a guy who alphabetizes his cereal boxes."

* * *

><p><em>What the hell are you doing, Ryan Wolfe? <em>Calleigh shook her head as she witnessed the performance in front of her.

_Smiling? Laughing? That girl looks doe-eyed,_ the Southern blonde grumbled.

As the brown-haired CSI departed the Trace Lab, a cunning smile plastered itself upon his face. This was all just too easy.

A determined, well-manicured hand caught him by the arm, swinging him around to her view.

"And what do you think you're doing?" Calleigh berated.

"Excuse me?" Ryan spat. "Is there a problem with saying 'hello' to Molly?"

"You mean 'flirting'?" she retorted with a harsh whisper. "How do you think Natalia's going to feel about this?"

"Nothing," he whispered back, his eyes squinting as he came closer, "because if it all works out, I will be the last person on Natalia's mind," he smirked.

Gradually, Calleigh's eyes widened as she became aware of his truthful meaning. "You're not talking about Jay, are you?" Ryan's increased smirk only confirmed things. "Oh, my- and is Miss Sunshine in there a part of your plan, too?" she scorned, her hands placed sourly against her hips.

"First, her name is Molly. Second, no," Ryan chuckled, turning his view back to the youthful lab tech, "but, I'm free to live my life as well."

"You're an idiot," Calleigh contended.

Turning back, the CSI rolled his eyes. "I don't care what you think." A swift pain attacked his abdomen as Ryan winced to bite back a cry. The wound had been lightly throbbing for some time, but only now was it really beginning to cause agony.

"Ryan?" Calleigh questioned concernedly. "Babe, are you okay?" She curved under to get a better view of his face, which clearly seemed in pain.

"I'm fine," Ryan lied, attempting to compose himself, "it's just a little sore. Alexx said it would happen."

"Do you need me to call her?" she offered as she pulled out her cell phone.

In haste, Ryan placed a hand against her phone. "No!" he bellowed. "I'm fine, seriously. Just need to cool it on the physical activity, that's all." Breathing deep, he moderated the pain, his eyes peering open as his body relaxed.

"Okay, but at least get it looked at," Calleigh suggested sternly. "And maybe that head of yours as well." Walking off, Calleigh grumbled beneath her breath again. _Stubborn fool..._

"Too late!" he shrewdly shouted down the hall. Ryan rubbed against the pain again. He wasn't going to let one little gunshot wound get in his way.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I feel this chapter might be a little rushed, but I really wanted to get the story rolling. Let me know your thoughts. Also, I had to watch that Molly/Ryan scene a ton of times to write it for here... I deserve cookies... my poor RaiN heart...


	7. Point of No Return

**Chapter 7 – Point of No Return**

Ryan stared lovingly at the mechanical structure, the shiny metal glimmering from the locker room lights.

The telescope was beautiful, but that wasn't what warmed Ryan's heart. Every day, his co-workers showed how much he belonged, even when they weren't trying.

A ringing resounded against the walls as he shut the locker door and turned away. "You guys sure about Cuban?" Ryan smiled to Walter and Natalia. "Because I heard everyone else is just meeting up at the bar."

"Works for me," Walter nodded and rubbed his stomach generously. "As long as there is some spicy food to eat, I don't care where we go."

"Great," Natalia stated sweetly. "I'll be a little late though." Picking up her purse, the brunette straightened out her blouse before heading towards the door.

"Late?" Walter questioned, a brow raised as he slammed his locker closed quickly.

Ryan fidgeted with his new telescope, attempting to seem uninterested. His eyes said otherwise, his head low as they watched the female.

"Yeah, I need to go home and get ready," she smiled, her cheeks illuminating a bright red. Slowly she turned on her heels to face the men.

"For?" Walter continued to inquire, his hands gesturing for more information.

"I… have a date," she chirped, her chestnut eyes darting in Ryan's direction hoping to witness a reaction.

Both men's eyes widened as a cheeky grin perched upon their faces.

Definitely not the reaction she was hoping for…

"A date?" Ryan stated as he feigned a surprised expression. "With who?" He placed the telescope beside the locker before casually crossing his arms and leaning against the metal himself. _This__is__good,_he devilishly thought.

"The new QD guy, Jay."

"Really?" Ryan gasped innocently, his interrogation skills easily paying off.

"Yeah," Natalia replied. Her face furrowed in confusion. _Why__does__he__seem__so__happy__about__this?_ "I was hoping you guys wouldn't mind if I brought him along since he's still new to the team."

"I think that's a great idea, Talia," Ryan chimed with a hyper twinkle in his eye. _This__is__perfect__…_

Walter, unbeknown to the current situation, darted his eyes back and forth between the two as if watching a tennis game. "Something I should know about?"

"Oh," Ryan declared suddenly, "no. I'm just really excited for Natalia." His grin remained bright as he lifted up his new gadget, wincing from the movement, and approached the exit of the locker room. Conveniently, Ryan squeezed around the brunette blocking the threshold, still maintaining a smile that masked the throbbing pain his side gave him.

"Thanks," she said quietly, her eyes squinting suspiciously, "I think."

"I'll see you guys there!" he shouted back.

The two CSIs watched as Ryan confidently strolled towards the elevator and eventually out of sight.

"What was that?" Walter questioned, the voice dripping with uncertainty.

"He's playing a game, Walter," the female grumbled. Her arms crossed against her chest as she grinded her teeth. "He won't win."

* * *

><p>The active bar resonated with a noisy crowd of customers as Ryan took another sip of his beer. The alcohol didn't falter his mindset much, but it did help with the throb that seemed to disappear with each swallow.<p>

Most of the gang was already sitting around the table, each person's hand clinging mercilessly to their drinks. A certain brunette, however, had yet to arrive.

"So, I said to the dude," Walter bellowed as he continued his story for the eager ears listening, "I don't care if he's wearing a shirt and shoes. We don't service monkeys in this store!"

"What did the guy do?" Eric questioned with interest. A small chuckle escaped his lips as he listened intently.

"He motioned to the monkey to grab a frying pan," Walter stated as he acted out the scene, "who then began chasing me around the store!"

A conglomerate of chuckles echoed around the table. It wasn't so much what the monkey had done but the fact that someone as pronounced as Walter would be chased… then Ryan remembered the bear.

"You!" Ryan hardly breathed, slapping his knee and pointing in Walter's direction, "you were afraid of a monkey?"

"Hey!" Walter spat, "I was 17! It was my first job!"

"Okay, but," Calleigh chimed in as she collected her giggles, "what does that have to do with going into law enforcement?"

Walter grinned widely, his eyes inclining to the ceiling as if remembering a dream. "Officer Davis," he sighed before looking back to the group. "She came to arrest the man… and his monkey. What a sight! And she was incredibly sweet to me. I mean, true, I went to college and got my degrees…"

"In Art History," Ryan joked.

"Yes, in Art History," Walter spat again, "but since that day, I always knew I would find my way into law enforcement."

"So," Eric began after another gulp of his toxic pleasure, "you got into the business because of a woman."

"I think it's romantic," Calleigh voice sweetly, her eyes darting toward Eric almost involuntarily.

"I think it's idiotic," Ryan retorted. A scuff of breath sat on Eric's words.

"You would think that," he remarked. Quickly, his eyes reached over Walter's tall head, a snarky smile following closely. "Speak of the devil…"

"Hi, everyone!" the brunette CSI shouted above the crowd as she and her date approached the table. Looking to her left, Natalia presented an arm. "I think most of you have met Jay." The blond nodded and smiled at every member of the team.

"Hello, again!" Jay bellowed. He smiled widely as he watched the group shift around the table to make room for the couple. "Ladies first," he smiled to Natalia and pulled out the chair for her.

"So, Jay," Walter began, "where did you transfer in from?"

"Alabama, actually," he stated quickly, a hand in the air as he signaled for the waiter.

"I thought I detected a hint of twain in your voice," Calleigh joked with a wagging finger.

Chuckling a bit, Jay breathed in a light sigh. "Well, I only lived there for a couple of years before I decided for a change."

"Change in…" Eric coaxed. Jay just grinned.

"Atmosphere," he announced as he continued to signal for a waiter to no avail.

"You liking the new atmosphere so far?" Ryan grinned as he raised his eyebrows high and gained a stern look from Natalia.

"Loving it," Jay grinned. His eyes glimmered towards the brunette, Natalia returning a shy expression as she brushed her fingers through her soft hair.

An awkward silence fell upon the group, save for Ryan who reveled in the moment_.__Everything__is__going__exactly__as__I__planned__it_, he prided.

As first, Ryan wasn't sure how he would feel seeing another man with eyes for Natalia. However, just observing that mirthful smile of hers made it worth the trouble.

Satisfied, the male CSI gulped down the remaining alcohol from the bottle.

"I'm not getting any service here," Jay suddenly voiced, his eyes still locked on the beautiful brunette. "Do you want anything?"

"Uh, yeah, just a beer," Natalia replied. Quickly, both leaned in for a peck on the lips. Nothing too fancy or passionate…

… but it was just enough to stop Ryan dead in his tracks. Instantly, he began coughing on the bitter liquid, his face turning a crimson color from embarrassment. _They__'__re__already__kissing?_ he wildly thought as Walter patted his back next to him with concern.

"You okay, Wolfe?" the dark man asked in his booming voice.

"I'm fine," Ryan barely breathed. "Just went down the wrong tube, that's all." Glaring up, he took note of Natalia's new expression: contempt. But was it contempt of her new relationship? Or contempt of outsmarting her opponent? He couldn't tell.

Watching Jay run off to find a waiter, Ryan stood up to leave as well. "Gonna go clean up," he smirked falsely.

* * *

><p>The CSI looked in the mirror at his reflection. <em>What<em>_am__I__doing?_ he thought. The men's bathroom was so quiet and deserted, Ryan could have almost thought he said those words aloud. Dropping his head, he caressed his rough hands beneath the cold, pouring water, gently lifting them up to splash the liquid against his face.

"Is this really what you want?" a voice stated flatly behind him. Turning around, Ryan opened his watery eyes to face the Cuban with dismay. He grabbed a paper towel and dried himself off.

"What are you talking about, Delko?" Ryan evaded, throwing away the used paper and heading towards the exit.

"Calleigh told me about your plan," Eric stated resolutely.

"Of course she did," Ryan mumbled and turned back to face the Cuban once more. "Look, as long as she is happy, I'm happy. I could care less who Natalia is with."

"She'd be happier with you."

"You don't know that," Ryan spat.

"Yes, I do!" Eric retorted just as stern. "We all know that, but you're too afraid to fess up that anyone could love someone like you."

"Hey!" Ryan shouted as he approached to his co-worker, "I could have anyone at any time, okay?"

"If you really believed that, you would have told Natalia how you feel a long time ago," Eric stated, his teeth grinding with intensity.

"I don't have to listen to this," Ryan sighed and turned back to leave. Another wrong move. Pain shot through his torso as he once again doubled over in pain and gasped for air. This wasn't something Ryan could pretend wasn't happening this time.

"Ryan," Eric cried concernedly. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Ryan groaned as his muscles cringed. "I'm fine." Taking in deep breaths, the young CSI controlled the pain and straightened his posture. "It was just a cramp."

"That looked like more than a cramp, Wolfe," Eric replied.

"I said I'm fine," he repeated, and swung the bathroom door open, leaving Eric behind.

Coming up to the team's table, Ryan noticed the lack of people still hanging around.

"Where's Natalia?" Ryan asked as nonchalantly as possible.

"Oh," Calleigh chimed, "she and Jay decided to call it a night."

"This early?" Ryan asked as he looked around absently, hoping to see the brunette one last time. "They just got here."

"Why do you care, Wolfe?" Walter interrogated with a grin.

Ryan's eyes shaped into slivers as he glared back at his tall friend. "I don't, Walter." Annoyed, he grabbed his jacket that lay against the back of the chair. "Night, guys."

The pain still throbbing through his t-shirt, Ryan finally nudged his way towards the exit. Pushing the doors open, Ryan paused at the sight before him. Time slowed to a miniscule speed if it wasn't at a standstill already.

Natalia and Jay were in the most passionate kiss. The brunette was pushed against Jay's vehicle as he caressed her soulfully.

Ryan's heart dropped. He didn't realize how much it would hurt to see Natalia with another man. Before his presence was made aware, the male CSI scurried to his own car, quickly driving out of sight.

He did this to himself, and now he would need to deal with the consequences.

* * *

><p>Natalia gasped for a breath and pushed Jay from the embrace. Her bottom lip quivered slightly as her nerves took over. "I'm sorry," she apologized, "I'm just not ready for this."<p>

Staring into her chestnut eyes, Jay smiled lovingly. "That's okay," he reassured her." I don't want to push you into anything you don't want."

"No, I do want this," Natalia whispered, her eyes lowering to his lips. _Just__not__with__you__…_ "Just not yet."

Jay shrugged his shoulders and smirked. "Little kisses okay?"

"Perfect."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Oh-My-God... I am soooooo sorry! In no way did I mean to ignore this story one bit, but life had to come first (I'm going to back to school to obtain a degree in theatre) and so the story had to take a back burner. Once again, SOOOOOOO sorry! I'm going to try my hardest to start updating this normally again. I can't completely promise anything, but I can try my best. Love you all for sticking with me and a big thank you to those who subscribed to this story despite its lack of updates.


	8. Author's Note

Dear readers:

I apologize for the interruption, but this story has left me with very limited motivation. I feel awful because I wanted to give you wonderful people a sequel you deserve!

Here's my question: Do you want me to continue this story? If this is what most of you want, then I will, and I promise to put my all into it. However, I actually have something else I finally developed that might spike your interest a bit more.

Your options are as follows:

1. Continue this story  
>2. Start the new story and scrap this one<br>3. Finish this story and then write the other as an alternative sequel.

The choice is yours. I really want everyone's opinion considering I can't seem to make up my own mind.

Thanks everyone!

Danielle


	9. Next Time I Fall

**A/N:** Omg, I apologize for that embarrassing author's meltdown I had earlier. But I thank each and every one of you for replying back so flippin quickly! Because of you, I have found my motivation and plan for this story once again. Seriously, I even wrote this chapter today (I usually take a couple of days to write, edit, re-write, edit again, ask friends' questions...it's a process, lol).

So, here's the deal: I will continue to write this story how I originally planned it out. For those who wanted the other story, you WILL get it but not until after I finish this one (which I plan to do within the month.) For those who wanted me to completely scrap this one, I promise this story will have meaning to the next RaiN saga I have planned. So EVERYONE BEAR WITH ME!

Anyway, your entertainment down there... I bet you've been wondering about Ryan's pain, huh? Find out below...

* * *

><p><strong><span>Chapter 8 – The Next Time I Fall<span>**

The pain in his side with nothing compared to his throbbing head. What was wrong? Ryan didn't have time to answer that question. Right now, getting to his appointment with Dr. Gallagher mattered most.

As the elevator doors closed in front of him, Ryan glanced at his reflection. The pale skin that surrounded his eyes was disconcerting. Maybe he was coming down with something. _Or __maybe __I __wasn__'__t __taking __care __of __that __stupid __gunshot __wound!_ he thought angrily.

The doors spread open to a better looking corridor than the doctor's original location. Fortunately, the beautiful red-head didn't have to wait long for a more permanent office. Rushing down the hall, Ryan barely caught his step as he flew through the waiting area's threshold. Dr. Gallagher's newest secretary stared worriedly at him.

_Maybe I look worse than I thought…_

"I'm here for my appointment with Dr. Gallagher," he awkwardly mentioned.

The short blonde's big green eyes widened slightly as she lifted the phone from the receiver. She tapped in the extension to the adjacent room, and soon a mumbled "Is my next appointment here, Miss Bands?" was heard.

"Yes," she answered quietly. "He's here, but he doesn't look too good." She listened carefully, nodding and humming an affirmation sporadically. "Yes, of course."

Moments after hanging up, the Dr.'s door swung wide open, the caring female glaring back at Ryan. "You don't look too healthy, Mr. Wolfe."

"I know, but…"

"No 'buts'," she quipped. "We'll reschedule for another time. You go see a doctor right away."

The CSI grumbled. He attempted arguing with this woman before, but her strong Irish blood left him speechless the last time. Arguing wasn't going to happen with her.

But that didn't mean he had to listen to her…

"Okay," Ryan voiced with a rasp beneath his breath. He stepped back lightly and headed towards the elevator. If she didn't want to see him today, that was fine, but he wasn't going to some damn doctor if he was just sick with a cold… or something.

* * *

><p>He made it. He didn't really know how, but Ryan made it to the lab without creating any accidents. He trudged to the elevator and pressed the button for the lab's level, swearing he would beg for Advil from the next person he ran into.<p>

In his case, the action was literal. Papers went flying through the air as Ryan stepped out of the metal lift.

"Oh, God, Calleigh. I'm sorry," he said sheepishly to glob of blonde hair before him. He slowly made his way down to help with the scattered forms.

"Actually, it's Molly," the voice chimed brightly as she lifted her head. Her previously merry smile rapidly vanished the moment she saw Ryan's complexion. "Ryan, you look awful!"

"Thanks," he joked and began to stand up with her. Quickly his knees buckled beneath him, his body falling mercilessly to gravity. With a hard thump to the pavement, Ryan cradled his torso in agony.

"Ryan!" Molly screamed. "I need help here!" she shouted to no one in particular. Soon, Walter and Eric came rushing to Ryan's side and effortlessly carried the young male to the break room, a mix of wonder and worry etched on their faces.

"What's going on, Wolfe?" Eric questioned as he pulled Ryan's arm from around his neck to situate him down to the couch.

"Yeah, you're not looking so hot, Ryan," Walter added.

"It's probably just the flu, guys," Ryan insisted through a labored breath. He continued to caress the side of his body where the pain hurt the most.

Pushing through the small crowd of people he had acquired, the little blonde huffed in detest.

"I will be the judge of that," Molly stated confidently. Bending down to the hurting CSI, she nodded for Ryan to let go and lifted the shirt slowly. "My mother was a nurse," she smiled, a grim look soon following. "Well, it's infected."

"We gotta get you to the hospital, Wolfe," Eric said.

"No!" Ryan protested, "no hospitals!"

"I don't think you have a choice, Ryan," Walter argued.

"Fine," Ryan grumbled, "but no ambulance. I'll just drive there." With a slow temperament, Ryan began to stand back up determinedly.

"Ha!"Eric snorted, his arms crossing against his chest, "not in that condition."

"I'll take him," voiced a man behind the group. Turning around, all eyes met with Jay's as he gave them a small grin.

_No __way__… _he thought.

"I know the way," Jay continued, "and, this is off the record, but I have quite a bit of a lead foot." Pausing, he waited for affirmation of the group with little success. "Besides, I'm sure the rest of you have a ton of work on your plate at the moment."

A devilish smile formed on Eric's face as he turned back to Ryan. "It's this or the ambulance."

Grumbling again, his teeth grinding rigidly against each other, Ryan nodded. "Fine." The group started to walk out, Eric and Walter holding Ryan up for support. "This is punishment, isn't it?" he whispered to Eric.

"What? I thought you liked the guy," Eric joked just as quietly. "He's good enough for Natalia, isn't he?"

Ryan remained quiet. _Why __does __Delko __have __to __be __right?_

* * *

><p>"So, Natalia speaks fondly of you," Jay suddenly mentioned. The lab was about 10 minutes away from the hospital, so Ryan hoped the ride would be in silence. "I take it you two have been friends for awhile."<p>

"You could say that," Ryan quietly replied. _Where __is __this __going?_

"I'll admit, I offered to drive you under false pretenses," Jay admitted. "I know this isn't the best time to talk about it, but I wanted to know just how close you two really are." Jay shot a glance back at Ryan who cringed at the question. "It's okay if you don't want to answer, or can't in your condition."

"We're close, but not like that," Ryan quickly answered back. _Hurry __up__…_

"Good," he praised, "because I really like Natalia and can even imagine a future with her someday. But I don't want—,"

"You want to make sure you're not overstepping boundaries," Ryan finished.

"No," Jay contended. "I don't want to deal with jealousy."

Taken aback, Ryan stared at Jay. _What?_ _Jealousy? __Yeah, __sure. __I__'__m __far __from __jealousy._

I've seen it before," he stated bluntly. "A male-female friendship turning into something more."

"I don't see Natalia like that," Ryan lied. "Honest. I even hated her at one point."

"Okay," Jay breathed as he pulled into the emergency bay. Parking, he turned to face Ryan in the passenger seat. "Because if this is some game you're playing to make her jealous or something, I will find out. Natalia doesn't deserve that."

"It's not," Ryan stated, eyes shutting to the pain working through his body.

"Do you need help going in?" Jay offered, his demeanor completely changing into concern.

"No, I got it," Ryan assured him. "I'm pretty sure Eric called Alexx, so it won't be pretty in there," he joked. Looking up, he realized the confusion Jay portrayed. "Inside joke."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Such a stubborn fool, he is. Alexx will set him straight, lol. And where has Jesse been? Hmmm...

**NOTE:** ff did some weird kind of thing with all of my italicized sentences by taking all of the spaces out. I tried to fix them, so sorry if I missed any...


	10. Say Say Say

**A/N:** As I said in my one-shot *that I just posted*, I was out of town, so I couldn't really work on this! But now that I have a 4 day break, I'm running at full speed (for as much as I can before Monday rolls around).

Enjoy!

* * *

><p><strong><span>Chapter 9 – Say Say Say<span>**

Clicking her tongue against the roof of her mouth, Alexx sighed at the sight before her: Ryan lying impatiently in an ER bed, fluids pumping full force into his body. One of her babies was still trying to play it tough.

_Some things never change, I guess…_

Looking down at the chart, she examined Ryan's prognosis and let out another sigh, though much louder and purposeful than earlier.

"Ryan, Ryan, Ryan," she commented somberly as she walked towards his bed. "I thought I told you to take care of yourself."

"I did!" the young man argued, lifting his head to stare at her with his puppy-dog eyes. She just stared right back with the motherly look that had been known to even break down the Lieutenant himself. Lying back against the pillow, he grumbled in defeat. "Okay, so maybe I didn't. But it's not like I wasn't trying to. It was just the last thing on my mind."

"Oh," Alexx quipped brightly as she took a glance at the infection. "And what was the first?"

Ryan shrugged melancholy-like. "Just cases," he dully responded, his focus to the hospital's tiled ceiling.

"Just?" the doctor huffed. "Nothing else? Not even a certain someone…"

"Ugh!" Ryan groaned as he closed his eyes, "not you, too. Alexx, there is nothing going on."

A pleasant smile grew from Alexx's lips. "Eric used to say the same thing to me," she chuckled. Carefully, the doctor began cleaning the CSI's infection.

"Huh?" Ryan breathed, his eyes widening.

"We would have lunch sometimes after I left the lab," Alexx mentioned casually, "and sometimes the conversation of a female persuasion would possibly pop up. Every time he would say, 'Alexx there is nothing going on.'" The caring woman huffed. "I'm a mother, and I know **exactly** what that means."

"Well, this time you're wrong," Ryan retorted.

"Eric said that as well," Alexx grinned as she finished wrapping the injury.

Groaning, Ryan perched himself up to a sitting position and starred at the IV line strapped to his arm. "How long do I have to stay here?" he grumbled.

"I want to keep you overnight to make sure your body is taking well to the medication," Alexx chimed. "You're lucky I snatched your chart when I did. That grouchy head nurse of mine was about to make her rounds. But I suggest you take care of yourself because I might not be able to help again."

"Thanks, Alexx," Ryan grinned and watched the doctor begin to open the curtain that separated the patients.

She stopped and pivoted slowly on her heels.

"I know you just want Natalia to be happy," she quietly commented.

"I do," Ryan answered, his reply barely audible.

"But at some point, you need to let yourself be happy as well," Alexx pointed out.

"I **am** happy," he stuttered confidently, his eyes darting back and forth between the female's concerned orbs.

"Now that," Alexx snapped, "is a bold-face lie."

_**March, 2011**_

The television was a black void, but that didn't stop him from staring endlessly into its vortex, thoughts rambling like a three-ring circus.

_What __does __she __mean, __a __bold-face __lie?_he thought curiously. _I'm __happy. __I'm __happy __that __she's __happy. __Shouldn't __that __be __enough?_

Ryan carefully rolled to his back on the lumpy couch, the only dead-beat furniture he was okay with keeping in his flat.

_Ugh, who am I kidding? All I ever think about is Natalia..._

"This was the stupidest plan ever," he announced aloud.

"I agree," Jesse chuckled causing Ryan to jolt hard enough to elicit some pain.

"Ugh," Ryan groaned, hiding his face beneath his hands, "I hoping that...,"

"That I was brought on by your infection?" Jesse chuckled once more. "Sorry, man. Can't get rid of me just yet. But I do see that you're starting to think more clearly."

The younger CSI peered up to the ghost and eventually pushed himself to a seating position, his head nodding in agreement. "I think I'm going to tell Natalia the truth."

"About time!" Jesse praised.

"Hey, don't get too excited," Ryan warned with his hands up in defense. "I haven't told her yet."

Rolling his eyes, Jesse sat atop the couch's arm rest. "Wolfe, quit doubting that she feels the same way, okay?"

"I just don't want to hurt her," Ryan whispered as his eyes peered down to his fidgeting hands.

"With the words you two have exchanged over the past years, "Jesse teased, "I think there's little you can do to hurt Natalia anymore."

"Alright," Ryan interrupted as he painfully stood up, "enough out of you." Pointing to the front door, Ryan attempted to prod Jesse out. "Out. I need my rest."

"You do know a wooden door can't stop me from coming back," Jesse reminded him, his steps casually moving closer to the exit.

"I don't care," Ryan retorted and opened the door. As Jesse stepped out of the house, the brown-haired CSI smiled weakly. "Goodbye," he stated, slamming the door in one swift move.

Barely did seconds pass before a trill of knocking sounded against the front door. Ryan rolled eyes and attempted to swing the door back open.

"You know, for a ghost, you're a real pain in the-,"

A beautiful brunette stood quietly past the threshold, her chestnut eyes immense in the moment as she held a small Tupperware container in her hands.

"Oh," Ryan stuttered, "Natalia." His heart rate suddenly shot up in a rapid speed. _What __a __coincidence..._

"Can... I come in?" the female gently inquired as she poked her head slightly into the living room. "Or are you busy?"

"No!" Ryan quickly answered, "come in." As he closed the door, he watched Natalia aimlessly wander to the kitchen with her items.

"I was designated the representative of the lab," Natalia mentioned nonchalantly. "So, I figured I'd bring you some soup." Turning around, their eyes made contact with each other, Ryan still at the other side of the room. "It's my mother's recipe."

"Thanks," Ryan countered. Awkwardly, he began sitting back down on the couch. Laughing internally, Ryan realized how nervous and perplexed he had become.

"So, how long before you can come back to work?" Natalia inquired as she sat next to him. Her warm smile helped Ryan relax a little.

"A couple of days," Ryan sighed. "I bet the lab's been a huge mess without me."

"Oh, definitely," Natalia humored. "Eric's head has become so huge!" Both CSIs giggled as Natalia's eyes caught sight of a letter lying crumpled up on the coffee table. "I see you got the same notice."

Stopping short of his laughter, Ryan remembered the piece of paper: notice of Chad Hayward's Post-Indictment Arraignment. "Yeah, I did."

"Are you going to go?" Natalia questioned quietly but received no response. "I went to his first one right after he was arrested. Was still pleading not guilty."

"I don't know if I should," Ryan remarked, his teeth grinding. "I don't know if I could keep myself from wanting to choke him." Though, he was more afraid of always feeling that urge than actually acting on it.

"As a cop, I'd have to pretend I didn't hear that," Natalia joked. "But it's fine if you don't want to come. Jay said he would support me, so...,"

"Wait," Ryan cut off, "Jay's going?"

"Well, yeah," Natalia replied curiously. "He's been really sweet to me."

"So, you two are **really** serious?" Ryan prodded angrily.

"Why do you even care?" Natalia spat back, her body shifting uncomfortably.

"I don't," Ryan bluffed, his eyes darting in any direction but her focus. "I'm just saying it's strange you would become so serious with a guy you hardly know."

Natalia's mouth dropped at Ryan's words. _Is __he __for __real?_ "Wow. Do you even hear the words coming out of your mouth?" she barked.

"I'm just saying-,"

"Jay asked me out, okay? He asked **me** out, and I said yes! What did you want me to do? Wait around for something that might never happen? How is that fair to me?"

The words tried their damnedest to escape Ryan's thoughts, but nothing voiced out.

"Now, I really like Jay. I can even see a future with him. You know why? Because he's the first person since Nick who's actually taken a risk to go out with me. And I mean a serious risk. I would have figured you, of all people, **my ****best ****friend**, would support me with this."

"That's not my point, Talia," Ryan injected.

"Then what is your point?" Natalia countered, "huh?"

"That I-," he stammered, his heart now beating at a thousand miles a minute, "I-,"

He stared deep into Natalia's eyes and saw what he feared...the hurt. Ryan pressed his lips together and became silent, his focus declining down the floor.

"That's what I thought," she snapped, her head shaking in disappointment as she stood up to leave. "Enjoy your soup."

Ryan groaned at the slamming of his own door.

Looked like his original plan was working. Natalia was falling for someone else... and Ryan hated it.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **I'm hoping this gives a little more clarity of Natalia's motivations, that she's not really using Jay to get back at Ryan.

I went ahead and threw in what month we are in for reference (only 2 1/2 months to go before "Mayday.") Also, no one has guessed the theme of the chapter titles. =(.


	11. You Might Think

**A/N:** Another long chapter! Also, the titles ARE songs... but not just any ole list of songs... 80's songs (I'm a huge fanatic. Figured I would share that with you!)

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 10 – You Might Think<strong>

"You can send him in now, Prudence," Dr. Gallagher announced into her phone, her golden pen neatly scribing doctor gibberish on a pad as she sat behind her dark, wooden desk.

The door to the office slowly crept open, Ryan finally sticking his head inside nervously.

"Hello, again," Ryan sheepishly greeted as he passed the threshold. The Irish woman smiled and stood, carefully walking around to her "Psychologist's" chair.

"Hello, yourself, Mr. Wolfe," she greeted back, taking a seat. "I see you're doing much better."

"Sorry about that," he apologized, taking a seat of his own on the comfortable couch.

"Ah," Dr. Gallagher interrupted, a manicured finger stopping his speech, "we don't apologize in here, remember?"

Ryan gave her a weak smile. "Unless it's warranted, I know."

"We have a lot to go over after having to reschedule. So, let's talk about your social life," Dr. Gallagher mentioned nonchalantly, wanting to jump into the conversation right away.

"What about my social life?" Ryan asked, his brows scrunching in confusion.

"What kind of support group outside of work do you have?" the doctor asked.

"I, uh," Ryan started, shifting in his seat uncomfortably, "I'm not sure how this is going to clear me mentally." He scratched his brow nervously.

Dr. Gallagher quickly scribbled something down before looking back up to the CSI. "You know I ask everything for a reason," she smiled.

Pressing his lips together, Ryan gave a slight nod. "Right. Well," he stammered, "I don't really have a life outside of the lab. I used to, but I was gambling then."

"So, your support comes from within the lab?"

"I guess you could say that," Ryan stated in an unsure tone. "I mean, I've finally developed a stable friendship with Delko and Calleigh. I have a pretty good rapport with all the lab techs. And then Natalia-." Ryan stopped himself short. He didn't want to go down that road.

"Natalia?" Dr. Gallagher repeated as her head cocked to the side in interest.

"Yeah, it's nothing. She's just a co-worker, " Ryan stated beneath his breath. "Can we just talk about something else?"

"Is this the same Natalia who was involved in the stalker case with you?" she questioned. The doctor swiftly stood and walked to her desk again, grabbing hold of a folder containing information on the case.

"Yeah," Ryan answered nervously. "Why?"

"I know you two spent a lot of time together during this," she affirmed as she glanced up.

"Did she say something to you?" Ryan prodded carefully.

"You know I can't tell you that," she smiled again, situating herself in the chair. "How did you feel about spending that much personal time with a co-worker?"

"It was nothing, really," Ryan lied. Letting out a heavy sigh, Ryan shook his head in defeat. "And there I go again." He quickly swallowed down the lump in his throat before speaking again. "It's my fault she was stalked. I sent the first 'Stupid Cupid' letter which then triggered something in Chad to have her for his own."

"And you sent the first letter because...," she cautiously inquired. Dr. Gallagher, who had numerous years under her belt with this, understood exactly why he did it. But it was up to Ryan to admit why.

"Because I wanted her to realize her beauty," Ryan finished, shrugging.

"That's an interesting want for someone who's 'just a co-worker'." The doctor waited a moment before repeating her previous question. "How did you feel about spending all of that time with Natalia?"

"It was awkward at first because we've only seen each other as friends," Ryan answered, relaxing a little into the couch. "But, despite the situation, we became pretty close in the end... really close," he noted with wide eyes, "so close we almost kissed."

"Did you want to kiss her?"

"Yes, definitely. And I got the feeling she wanted to as well."

"How did that make you feel?" the doctor questioned.

"Guilty," he confessed and brought his head to rest against his propped up hand. "She was falling in love with me but had no idea what I had done."

"Does she know now?"

"I don't think so," Ryan whispered.

"From what I'm hearing," the doctor began, sitting up straighter in her chair, "you're putting so much pressure on yourself to protect everyone else that you've become too afraid to let yourself love anyone publicly." The female swung around and placed the pad of paper and case notes atop a nearby table. "So, what I want you to do this week is take risks. Not physical risks, but personal ones. Start letting people in. Get them to know the real Ryan Wolfe for once."

"Personal risks," Ryan echoed, "got it."

* * *

><p>The clicking of Calleigh Duquesne's heels were no match for the Lieutenant's stride as the two walked the corridor of the lab together.<p>

"I would go, Horatio," Calleigh apologized, "I really would. But I'm swamped at the moment."

"I understand, Calleigh," the red-head assured her as they came to a stop near the elevator. The rest of the team soon joined them.

Ryan and Natalia darted focus away from each other. They still hadn't talked about the fight since the day Ryan returned to work, just professionalism and cases. It wasn't that Ryan didn't want to confront her; he just didn't know how...yet.

_Personal risks_, he thought. _Where do I even begin?_

"I take it there's a call out?" Eric questioned and watched Horatio and Calleigh nod in succession.

"Report says it's out in the glades," Calleigh mentioned. "Could have just been a hunting accident, though."

"I would take the call, but I'm pretty swamped as well," the Cuban grinned, winking in the blonde's direction.

"Yeah," Walter smiled, "I don't even know when I'll see day after all of the cases I'm working on."

"But I think Natalia and Wolfe are free," Eric stated quickly.

"Are they?" Horatio smiled and bowed his head down.

"Uh," Ryan voiced in confusion as he glanced between Natalia rolling her eyes and Eric grinning proudly. "Yeah, we are. I mean, with your permission, H."

"Nothing physical," Horatio reminded him.

"Right," Ryan affirmed with a confident manner. Turning to the brunette, he nodded towards the elevator's direction. "Coming?"

"Sure," Natalia grumbled, her teeth grinding lowly.

As the two awkwardly entered the lift and were eventually out of sight, Horatio finally turned back to the remaining team members and smirked.

"Normally I wouldn't condone this kind of behavior. But you three seem pretty sure on what your doing." A light chuckle escaped the Lieutenant's mouth at the sight of their fake doe-eyes. "Fair enough."

* * *

><p>The Hummer's engine roared quietly as the two sat in silence for most of the trip. With Ryan driving, Natalia was able to focus inwardly, hoping to get through the call as quick as possible.<p>

Ryan glanced at the female and frowned. "I'm sorry," he timidly breathed, "for my attitude about you and Jay."

Natalia lifted her head up from its propped position. "Thanks. I'm sorry for yelling at you like that."

"Don't," Ryan interrupted. "I deserved it." He gulped before continuing. "So, you and Jay are becoming serious?" he asked gently.

"Yeah," she replied with little confidence. "Well, I think we are. I don't know, I think Jay might be more into this relationship than I am."

"He's not forcing you to-,"

"No!" Natalia suddenly cried, "no, it's nothing like that. I think it's because ever since Nick, I've been more reserved with men... I don't kn- just forget it."

As if her strong-willed wall had suddenly broken, tears began to drain endlessly from the brunette's eyes. Subconsciously, Ryan grabbed a hold of Natalia's left hand and rubbed it gently.

"What's wrong?" Ryan questioned as he attempted to keep his focus on the road.

"Nothing," Natalia wept, "It's probably stress... It's just that... after being kidnapped by the psychic and the stalker and-," she spoke, wiping tears from her face, "I never thought I would be put another situation like that."

The male CSI knew what she was referring to: the Bridgette Walsh case. The power duo of Michelle and Dennis Baldwin held Natalia at gun point... with her own gun.

Ryan knew Natalia was in trouble; somehow, he felt the brunette was in danger. However, the best he could do was process the evidence and warn Horatio.

_No physical activity until the doctor releases you..._

He hated that sentence. He wanted to be there for Natalia but ended up feeling so useless.

"Hey," Ryan crooned while continuing to massage her hand, "you're here now. You're safe."

"I know," she sniffled, "it comes with the territory." Calming her sobs, Natalia looked down at the entwined hands and then smiled in the CSI's direction. "Thank you. I needed that."

"No problem," Ryan smiled brightly. "Now, dry those tears, Boa Vista. We have scene to process."

Natalia scoffed humorously and smacked her back hand against his bicep. "Shush, Wolfe, and pay attention to the road," she joked.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Aw, so things are getting back to normal. But just wait... I'm throwing in a monkey wrench, *evil grin*


	12. Owner of a Lonely Heart

**A/N:** ...hey... *kicks rock* sup? Sorry for the, uh...AWOL thing I did 2 years ago. I was heavily involved in...events (all good) in my life. I feel absolutely terrible about deserting the story and its readers, so much that once I found my mojo again, I made a vow to finish it completely before updating. Yup! The chapters are all finished and ready to be posted.

I gotta tell ya, this was incredibly difficult for me to do because I haven't been totally and completely invested in the show lately as much as I was then. Finishing this story required long hours of re-reading the saga in its entirety AND re-watching episodes. But it was a punishment I took for the sake of the story!

I really hope the completed material serves justice to what everyone was imagining. If you are reading this and still want to continue in the journey, thank you so much! Words could not describe your forgiveness, =).

A suggestion: Re-read the previous chapter if it's been a while.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 11: Owner of a Lonely Heart<strong>

The hands ticked away mercilessly as blue eyes stared them down in a seemingly endless gaze.

_Half hour, _Ryan realized. _I better get going. _Slamming the locker shut, the CSI began to reluctantly make his way towards the elevator. _ Don't want to be late, I guess. _

But what about Natalia? _No. She went to the first alone. No sense in dragging her into it again. _Ryan sped up his pace hoping to rid of this indecisiveness. The lift creaked and groaned once Ryan pushed the button to summon it.

"Come on," he urged, staring at the red flashing numbers that increased above him. "Let's just get this over with."

"Running out on me, Wolfe?" giggled the lovely brunette from behind him. Ryan widened his eyes and turned, tongue in cheek.

"Who, me?" he gasped as his eyes met hers, "never." The elevator chimed, and its doors slowly open. "After you," he gestured, a smile perched upon his face as Natalia stepped past the metallic doors. _A little support from each other couldn't hurt._

"Hold the elevator!" boomed a voice, the tall man's feet pounding the pavement in a sprint towards the two CSIs. "Natalia," breathed Jay, his hurry slowing down, "babe. Leaving so quickly?" He cocked a smile innocently at Natalia who then let out a sheepish giggle.

"Uh, sorry," she declared and shifted her focus to her partner. "Ryan, I'll meet you there, I guess."

"Uh, yeah," Ryan acknowledged. "Sure." Quietly, the two CSIs exchanged glances and positions. As the doors of the elevators sullenly closed on Ryan, he all but caught a glimpse of Natalia and Jay embracing in a passionate and deliberate kiss.

He was really starting to hate Jay.

* * *

><p>"Wow," Natalia stated breathlessly. "Are you performing for an audience?" she awkwardly giggled. A petite blonde caught the moment in the corner of her eye from a crystal glass lab room and grinded her teeth. Indeed, an audience was found.<p>

"No," Jay laughed off, "I just," he paused and gathered his words. "Are you sure you don't need me there at the arraignment?"

"I'll be fine," she sighed. Natalia stopped to examine Jay's concern. "There's nothing to be worried about, honest. Trust me."

"I do trust you, I just-"

"What?"

Jay paused and again determined his next words. "Nothing," he smiled and leaned in for a peck. "Nothing at all."

"Good," Natalia smiled in return. "Now, don't you have some files to catch up on before tonight?"

Both gave each other a cheeky grin and embraced the lips once more before Jay retreated in the direction he first came.

Waving to him, Natalia chimed out, "Think good thoughts for us!"

_Us? _he repeated silently, his hand involuntarily waving to the brunette behind him. _That's right…Ryan._

He was really starting to hate Ryan.

* * *

><p>"Are you crazy?" Calleigh grumbled to Natalia who was waiting for the elevator to return. As the doors opened, Calleigh quickly pulled her partner to one of the vacant lab rooms before she could escape.<p>

"Is that a rhetorical question?" Natalia pondered and pulled her arm free of the manicured hand. "I'm beginning to think crazy is an epidemic, almost."

"Stop it with the jokes, Natalia," the blonde roared. "And stop it with the games."

"What games?" Natalia retorted. "The only games I see being played are by you." Calleigh ignored it.

"You're in love with Ryan, not Jay," she replied.

"And you're in love with Eric," Natalia countered. A silence ensued. "I'm sorry," Natalia finally said after a long pause. "I just can't stand here and listen to you preach about love and romance when you won't even admit what you feel yourself." Turning on her heels, Natalia began to withdraw towards the elevator. Suddenly, she felt a breeze pass her by, the blonde storming quickly out into the hallway.

"Eric," Calleigh shouted towards the receptionist desk. The Cuban had just arrived back at the lab after a short stint involving a domestic dispute and some dead pets… fish to be exact. _Some relationships are just weird_, he thought. Before he could finish signing back in, the southern woman turned him towards her, and they met lips to lips. The kiss may have only lasted a few seconds, but to Eric it was an eternity.

He could have stayed there forever.

Pulling out of the gracious welcome, Calleigh finally let out a heavy sigh. "There," she stated to Natalia, whose eyes were wide and in shock. "You don't have that excuse anymore."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Short and sweet chapter to get the ball rolling. R&R!


	13. Stand Back

**A/N:** Lots of views, little reviews. That's okay! I wasn't expecting everyone to read again right away. I neglected this story for 2 years, so little reviews was bound to happen. For those who did review, thank you so much! I'm forever grateful.

This next chapter I had a lot of fun writing because it marks the return of a favorite villain. I definitely realized how much I loved writing that kind of creepiness and why "Stupid Cupid" was such a success. (Is that weird that I have a knack for creating creep characters? ha!)

Anyway, don't be anonymous readers! Review and share your love or hate for the story. Just be remember there is a difference between being critical and being rude, =).

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><p><strong>Chapter 12: Stand Back<strong>

"Sorry I'm late," Natalia whispered and slid quietly next to Ryan in the back of the court room. She was still amazed at the performance Calleigh gave back at the lab and almost spilt it to her friend. She decided it wasn't the best idea… not now at least.

"You're fine," Ryan stated under his breath. "They're running behind anyway."

"You're kidding me," she complained.

"Nope," said another voice. Natalia's eyebrows sprung up as she peered to the visitor next to Ryan. "Officer Wyzgowski!" she cheered with a cheeky smile. "How are you? How's your mother? How is everything?" She couldn't help the rambling.

"Woah, slow down with the interrogation," Steven laughed, Ryan's chuckle not far behind. "We'll all catch up at lunch. Sound good?" Both CSIs nodded in agreement.

"All rise."

Silently, the three rose in succession with the accompanied audience.

"Bring in the defendant," the judge exclaimed.

The man walking out had shaggy hair pulled back into a ponytail. He slouched over, his eyes fastened to the tiled ground beneath him. The eyes were solemn as he shuffled in, feet and hands chained with a set of bracelets.

This was not the stalker they remembered from before.

The crowd and judge sat as the defendant and his lawyer remained standing.

"Chad Hayward, you have been charged with multiple counts of Criminal Stalking including Trespassing and Breaking and Entering as well as three counts of Aggravated Assault and Battery on a Police Officer. How do you plead?"

"The, uh, defendant," the shifty lawyer voiced and looked frustratingly at his client, "pleads not guilty."

"Mr. Hayward, you do understand that by pleading 'not guilty', this will go to trial?"

"Yes, Your Honor," Chad announced, his voice low and humble. This was definitely not the same Chad who tormented them.

"Okay," breathed the judge. "For the sake of time, I will have the date of trial sent to all parties at a later time."

"Your Honor," Chad's lawyer quickly chimed, "the defense is asking that Mr. Hayward be released on his own recognizance."

"Motion denied."

"But Your Honor, Mr. Hayward was in a seriously repressed mental state at the time of the criminal activities, and, after therapy, has now been defined as mentally sane. He has become an outstanding citizen of the prison ward. It is in the defense's opinion that he is not a danger to himself or others anymore."

"Not a danger?" Natalia protested as she brought her hands into tensed fists. Ryan quickly grabbed her right hand and calmly stroked it; though, he was anything but calm.

"Mr. Jenkins," the judge interjected to the lawyer, "your client stalked and threated a police officer of the Miami-Dade Police Department. I believe it's in his best interest to **stay** in prison."

_You got that right, _Ryan thought irritably.

The judged quickly looked down at the paperwork before him and pinched his lips tight. "Right. Mr. Hayward will remain in lock-up without bail." The gavel slammed down causing Natalia to jolt slightly in her seat. "Bring in the next defendant." The judge peered down at his gold-encrusted watch. "And hurry it up. I have plans to get to."

The three officers stood up and stretched their arms.

"Well," Steven finally said, "that was close."

"Yeah, too close," Ryan growled.

As the bailiffs escorted the somber prisoner down the aisle, his focus suddenly caught a glimpse of the gallery and its members.

"Bella!" he exclaimed, his face bright and disturbing. The bailiffs realized his change in strength as well.

There's the Chad they remembered.

"Oh, Bella," he crooned, "how I've missed you so… your beautiful eyes…" Chad continued to fight against the bailiffs' intent to remove him from the room.

"Leave her alone," Ryan demanded. Steven pulled the CSI back as Ryan pushed his way passed Natalia and leaned closer towards the prisoner. Chad then shifted his eyes to Ryan, an eerie chuckle escaping his lips.

"I should tell her, Cupid…" Ryan's face hardened with anger.

"Get him out of here!" he shouted. Ryan quickly turned to Natalia to usher her out the room as well. "I guess therapy doesn't work for everyone," he laughed uneasily.

* * *

><p>Outside the courthouse, the sun shone bright. Natalia breathed in the fresh air with relief. <em>That's hopefully the worst it will get<em>, she thought.

"I guess this means we will probably be called as witnesses," stated Steven gravely. "I've been called before for trials, but not in this way."

"I know," Natalia added, "it's all too surreal."

"Then let's get lunch," Ryan suggested, "and forget about it for at least an hour." The three chuckled radiantly.

"Natalia," shouted a voice behind them. As everyone turned to see who was calling, Ryan grinded his teeth in misery.

"Jay," Natalia sighed with a smile. "I told you I would be fine." Jay rushed up to the brunette, caressed her shoulder and regaled with sweet words.

"I know," he stated, "but that doesn't mean I can't treat you to lunch."

"Oh," Natalia exclaimed, "the three of us were just about to head to lunch… Oh, my goodness." Natalia chuckled in embarrassment. "I'm so sorry. Jay, this is Officer Steven Wzygowski. Steven, Jay." The two men shook hands. 'We could all get lunch together."

"Oh, no," Steven smiled as he took the hint. "You two enjoy the afternoon. I have paperwork piled to the ceiling to take care of." He then noticed how quiet the other CSI had been.

"Ry?" Natalia asked. "You coming?"

"Uh, nah," Ryan frowned facetiously. "I don't want to be a third wheel. I'll see you guys back at the lab." He quickly removed himself from the scene before things became too tense.

* * *

><p>Strolling back to the Hummer, Ryan pinched the bridge of his nose, one hand in his pocket, as he tried his best to not visualize his fist in Jay's face.<p>

"Officer Wolfe!" Steven yelled from behind in a jog to catch up. "Question," he breathed.

"Yeah, what's up?" Ryan reduced his stride to a halt.

"What did Chad mean?" Steven inquired. Ryan shot back a puzzled look. "He called you 'cupid,' didn't he?" Ryan chuckled and began walking again.

"Look, I gotta get back to the lab—"

"You sent her the letters, didn't you?"

Ryan paused his steps again but remained silent for a moment.

"Not all of them, Steven. Just the first."

"Have you told her?" Steven inquired and scrunched his brows in confusion.

The CSI let out a heavy sigh and looked back at the brunette and her beau in front of the courthouse. They seemed to be deciding where to head off, their demeanors beaming.

"It's complicated." Ryan turned back towards the Hummer. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm late for therapy."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **R&R! Thanks, =).


	14. Bizarre Love Triangle

**A/N:** Not many reviews anymore, but that won't stop me from finishing this story! As the character I'm currently playing in "Based on a Totally True Story" says, "No loose ends!" and that's what I intend to stay true to. Huge thanks to those who DID review. Your kind words are wonderful!

Anyway, this particular chapter I took a new direction on. Think of the cuts like how "Wolfe in Sheep's Clothing" was edited in the beginning with the scenes going back and forth between different locations but mirroring each other. In this chapter, there are 3 locations: Ryan's last therapy session, Calleigh and Delko having lunch, and Natalia and Jay having lunch. It's a new approach I've never tried before, so bare with it.

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><p><strong>Chapter 13 – Bizarre Love Triangle<strong>

"You're late, Mr. Wolfe," the psychologist declared, her eyes not leaving the paperwork before her. The golden pen between her fingers rattled against the desk.

"I know, I'm sorry. I—"

"No excuses," she interrupted. "Have a seat. We have a lot to discuss today, seeing as this is your last session with me." Dr. Gallagher, smirking, finally raised her sight to his as Ryan sat down quietly.

* * *

><p>"That was some stunt you pulled today, Ms. Duquesne," Eric declared. One hand stroked the blonde's palm, and another studied the restaurant menu on the table carefully.<p>

"I know," she shook her head with small laughter, "I'm sorry, I—"

"Don't be," the Cuban interjected. "I'm not." He sighed heavily. "But we have a lot to talk about."

* * *

><p>"You just can't take 'no' for an answer, can you?" Natalia smiled as she and Jay sat down in the quaint café.<p>

"I know, I'm sorry, I—"

"You, apologizing?" the brunette giggled. "You really are one-of-a-kind." The two settled into a quiet temperament as they viewed the menus on the table.

* * *

><p>"So, did you attempt the advice I gave at our previous session?" the red head queried. She leaned into the chair and clasped her meager fingers together. "Any risks taken?"<p>

Ryan shrugged his shoulders. "Sure," he feigned. "Natalia and I seem to be re-connecting. Our relat-friendship is really getting back on track."

"So you were truthful with her?" she grinned.

"Not necessarily," he quickly returned. Seeing the doctor's reaction, Ryan immediately countered. "Work has been busy, so we really haven't had time to actually talk. Besides, she's in a meaningful relationship with someone else right now. It wouldn't be right."

"How does Natalia being in a relationship with someone else make you feel?"

"Oh, I am happy for her," he lied, "ecstatic even." The brief pause between them made Ryan uneasy. "Anyway, work has been great. I'm really taking pride in what I do. Everything seems to be falling right into place."

"It's okay for things to not 'fall into place,' you know," the doctor encouraged.

"I don't understand." Ryan shook his head in confusion. "Why shouldn't everything—"

"Life has a funny way of undermining our plans, subverting our need for control," she suggested.

"I'm a little OCD, though," he joked. "Losing control is not my style."

"It's not about losing control," Dr. Gallagher countered. "It's about letting go of the control, allowing things to take their own natural course."

* * *

><p>Calleigh lowered her eyes sheepishly. "It was a risk, I know," she answered, "but seeing Ryan and Natalia the way they are right now- I could never do that to you."<p>

"But after everything we've been through," Eric responded, "is it even possible to get back on track?'

"There is no track to get on," Calleigh pointed out, "there's only a new road to take. I'm not saying it will be easy," she continued as both hands reached for Eric's, his gaze coming to her eyes, "but we can't mend this if we are apart."

"True," Eric agreed. "I really made it hard for you to trust me again, huh?"

* * *

><p>"Question, Nat…" Jay smirked suddenly, his eyes still studying the choices. "What did Calleigh mean by 'not having that excuse anymore'?"<p>

"You witnessed that, huh?" she groaned, shaking her head. "It was nothing, really."

Jay considered her answer for a moment then chimed in again. "You know, Nat, you can trust me," he smiled. "We may not have known each other for long, but I'm willing to listen to anything."

* * *

><p>Ryan sat quietly, realizing he gave the doctor more to feed off of than he anticipated. His eyes met with an imperfect spot on the tile floor. He tried to will it to normalcy with his mind, but Ryan couldn't even control that.<p>

"You attended Chad Hayward's arraignment today, am I correct?" Ryan nodded, still staring down the imperfection. "Have you forgiven him?" The CSI sharply looked up from his previous gaze, baffled. "For what he did to you?"

"Why would I do that?" he chided in offense. "Why would I **ever **forgive him?"

"So you can move on with your life."

"That anger I have towards him fuels me every day," Ryan expressed sternly. "I go to work knowing there are more Chad's out there I need to find and—"

"And what?"

"And nothing," Ryan retorted.

* * *

><p>Calleigh pondered, realizing how long it had been since she thought of what happened during that case. The hurt and betrayal came flooding back as she remembered the day she moved out of Eric's apartment. "You're wondering if I ever forgave you." Eric slowly nodded his head. "How else could I have lived my life?"<p>

Eric tilted his head in curiosity.

"For the first couple of days, I woke up every morning angry," she admitted. "One day I realized that wasn't me. My life, my career isn't based on anger. It's based on empathy and—"

"And?"

"And compassion."

* * *

><p>Natalia peered up from the menu to Jay's glimmering eyes. The relationship seemed to really be going well, and she didn't want to do anything to jeopardize that. She couldn't out right tell him this was about another man. How would that be fair? But she couldn't base their feelings on a lie… could she?<p>

"Calleigh is just worried I haven't forgiven myself yet about what happened with Chad," Natalia misled. She wasn't proud of this.

"What happened with Chad wasn't your fault, babe," Jay assured her, his fingers strolling up to her hands to caress. "You couldn't do anyone harm if you tried. You are wonderful and beautiful and—"

"And?" Natalia giggled.

"And perfect."

* * *

><p>"Frankly, I'm surprised you forgave me. I barely could." Eric lamented.<p>

"Stubborn, prideful you? Loathing in self-pity?" Calleigh teased.

"I'm serious, Calleigh!" Eric raised his voice a little, but the tone was just as playful.

As the blonde continued to giggle, the two leaned in for a wistful peck.

"We have plenty of things to talk about, then," Calleigh smirked.

"And plenty of time to talk about it."

* * *

><p>"Besides, if anyone is at fault, it's that Wolfe character," Jay quipped, taking a sip of his water.<p>

"Excuse me?" Natalia hissed.

"Well, if it wasn't for him, maybe it would have never happened."

"If it wasn't for him," she shrilled, "I may not be here right now!" Grabbing her purse from the back of her chair, Natalia stood up to leave. "I think it's time for me to get back to the lab."

"What about lunch?" Jay demanded.

"I hope you enjoy it."

* * *

><p>"Have you forgiven yourself?"<p>

Ryan hadn't thought about it. _No_, he realized, but there was no time for that.

The doctor studied the man's change in demeanor before pulling out a pad of forms. "Ryan," she finally said, continuously jotting down on the papers, "things like this take time, more time than we have. I'm releasing you." She then held out the completed paperwork towards Ryan who collected it passively. "But this doesn't mean you can't come at any time to talk."

He stared down at the words etched along the white paper, the freshly scribbled signature. He sighed abruptly before standing up to head out. "Thank you." He quickly shuffled away from the chair and towards the exit.

"And Mr. Wolfe," Dr. Gallagher muttered, "take this last piece of advice. Come clean with Natalia. The longer you keep the charade going, the harder the fall will be in the end."

"That's a beautiful theory, Doctor."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Have at it.


	15. Urgent

**A/N:** Hey, all! Thanks for the reviews! Sorry I am unable to reply back to them like I used to, but I barely have the time to even update the story (good thing it's all typed up, huh?) Anyway, keep up with the amazing words...and it's possible some of you will be getting what you are wishing for...but not for awhile, lol.

Below is another "episode explained" chapter involving 9x18, ** About Face**. Hopefully, you've seen it?

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><p><strong>Chapter 14: Urgent<strong>

Ryan was finally cleared for physical activity, so he buried himself into his work. He did everything he could think of to keep his mind off of what the doctor stated. Every case that needed tech, he aided in it. If a witness needed to be located, he volunteered. He and Natalia even chased a couple of suspects.

It felt just like old times…until Horatio ordered him to time off.

_You've been catching shifts for two weeks straight,_ Horatio pointed out. _You proved your point._

Point? Ryan wasn't trying to prove anything…sort of.

_Ryan, you need to wake up…_

"I am awake," he countered. "I know what I'm doing."

_No, really wake up! Natalia needs you! _Jesse warned. _Something is wrong…_

The cell on his bed stand rattled around, breaking Ryan from the trance; Horatio needed him in while Natalia was out on public relations duty.

"Of course," Ryan replied, sitting up in bed as he rubbed his eyes vigorously. "I'll be right in."

"No. Meet Eric at the crime scene, instead," Horatio responded. "I'm sorry I'm dragging you in on your day off."

"No, it's no problem!" Ryan insisted. He jumped out of bed and found the nearest clothes possible. Blue t-shirt and black jeans. That'll do.

"Ms. Boa Vista will relieve you the moment she is done at the University," Horatio maintained.

"I could stay longer—"

"Mr. Wolfe," his boss cautioned.

"Got it," Ryan stopped. "In and out." His left thumb pressed against the cell phone to end the call.

* * *

><p>The phone trilled continuously, but no one would answer.<p>

"Hey, Natalia, it's Ryan. Where are you?" Ryan looked down at his watch. _She should have been here by now. _This wasn't like her. He thought back to his dream and Jesse's implication. "You hear from Natalia?" he inquired to Eric as the Cuban passed him by. The older CSI had just questioned the "witness" to the crime, but something definitely seemed off.

"No. I left her a message an hour ago," Eric replied warily.

"Yeah, I left her four messages," Ryan added. "I haven't heard back from her."

"Hmmm, four, huh?" Eric mocked. It **was **a serious issue, Natalia not showing up. Though he couldn't help but snicker at the young CSI's determination.

Ryan knew what he meant by it but wasn't in the mood for games. "This is my first day off in two weeks," he reminded him and quickly strode off.

* * *

><p>Hours went by as Natalia remained M.I.A. Ryan continued to assist in the murder case, trying not to show his concern for the brunette. <em>She can take care of herself, <em>he thought.

That was until Walter called. They found her vehicle at the University…abandoned. Natalia was missing.

"Still no word?" Molly asked as she entered the lab room, circling the glass table full of expensive equipment. She stared at the two men with empathy.

"No," Ryan barely uttered and shook his head in dismay.

"We have all of these people out 'looking' for Natalia," Jay grumbled, "and there is just no information."

"They're doing everything they can," Ryan quietly insisted.

"Well, it's not good enough!" Jay shouted and stormed out.

Molly winced as she watched him walk away before turning to Ryan. Laying a hand on his back, she attempted to reassure him. "Dave told me how you guys identified Patrick Clarkson in the lecture hall," she timidly began. "The entire city knows his face. They'll find her."

Saying nothing, Ryan wandered out. Somehow, he found himself in the locker room.

He slammed his fist into the metal, hard. Another punch, another hit. Nothing satisfied his anger. Ryan hated this feeling. He hated it the first time, the second time, the…more abuse against the metal. All Ryan wanted to do at that moment was to switch places with Natalia. His hands slid through his disheveled hair. Ryan winced, pulling the left hand down to examine it. It was bleeding.

"They found her!" Molly suddenly poked her head in the room, holding back a gasp of the wrecked locker. She had always wondered why they were in such bad shape.

Ryan darted passed Molly and towards the elevator. He stopped. Jay was already in the lift, the doors closing on him.

* * *

><p>He paced in the break room, unable to calm his nerves. <em>I should go to the hospital.<em>

No, she had Jay. _I'm trying to __**stop**__ what I started. Running to her like a hero defeats that._

His cellphone chirped its tune in his hand. Ryan looked down, quickly confused.

"Talia?" he answered.

"Ryan, how long before you can be at the hospital?" she inquired.

"Why, something wrong?"

"No, I need to you to pick me up." Natalia's voice was hushed as if she was making sure she wouldn't be caught.

"Are they releasing you?" Ryan continued. _What's going on?_

"Quit asking questions, Ryan!" she bellowed. Realizing her sharp temper, she took a deep breath to slow down. "I'll meet you in front of the ER…bye." The call dropped.

_I can't… _he glared at the phone. _She shouldn't be calling me every time she's in trouble. _Still, he glared.

"Screw it."

* * *

><p>"Babe," Jay crooned, strolling back into the room, "who was that?" He had been trying to obtain some information about Natalia's release from her nurses.<p>

"Oh, no one," she bluffed, taking hold of his arms from her less injured side as he walked closer. "Just some co-workers sending good thoughts."

"Is there anything you need me to get you?" he offered.

_Perfect._

"A cup of coffee?" Natalia sweetly grinned at the request. _Take the bait!_

"Of course," Jay replied just as sweetly. "I'll be right back."

Natalia carefully watched him wander out, smiling when he looked back to her. She counted three seconds.

"Finally." The female grabbed her clothes, her purse, and her phone. She was off.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** R&R!


	16. Secret Rendezvous

**A/N:** Hey, all! Thank you for sticking with me and this story! I had to take the last two weeks away from updating because other things needed my immediate attention. Anyway, here is a new chapter for all!

I felt like this backstory of "About Face" was necessary for me to cope with the idea that Natalia could suffer such a monstrous event and not be hospitalized. She was sent to the hospital in "Sleepless in Miami" for being drugged...but not for being involved in a roll over? Come on... no.

* * *

><p>Chapter 15: Secret Rendezvous<p>

_Come on, Ryan_, Natalia anxiously pleaded. Her escape from the hospital bed was only moments ago, so she had very little time before Jay or anyone else noticed her gone. _I don't have all day. _

Just then, the Hummer pulled up in front of her, but her partner-in-crime was not at the wheel.

"Eric?" Natalia questioned. "Where's Ryan?"

The CSI pinched his lips together, unsure of what to say. It was bad enough he was involving himself in this prison break. But he knew how dangerous the formula would be allowing the two to partner up right now. With Natalia barely surviving an abduction and rollover and Ryan's obvious concern for her…

"_It's just not the best idea right now, Wolfe," _Eric pressed. _"I'll go get her."_

"He got stuck in Trace," the Cuban fibbed. Well, technically he did get stuck. The new technician, Molly, seemed to be warming up to Ryan and offered her services.

He quickly changed the subject. "Couldn't lie around doing nothing, huh?"

"Could you?" Natalia mentioned, carefully climbing into the Hummer with her good arm. "Drive, Delko," she commanded, "and quick. They probably already know I've disappeared."

"Okay, Houdini," Eric smirked as he drove off. "Where to?"

* * *

><p>Natalia became knee deep in the investigation, absorbing her time into figuring out exactly what happened with the case four years ago to the current murder. The team was plenty worried, Ryan included.<p>

But he stayed out of her way…until she found him in Trace.

"You're coming with me," she demanded and spun on her heels. From the speed of her walk, she was expecting him to follow without a debate. "We're going to question that so-called 'eye witness' again."

"Wait, Talia," Ryan caught up and grabbed her by the shoulder. "Are you sure about this? Maybe you should slow down."

"Slow down?" she gasped. "Look, you can come with me or not, but either way, I'm doing this." Her cellphone began ringing. She silenced it.

"You're not going to take that?"

"It's just Jay," Natalia explained, rolling her eyes. "He's upset that I snuck out on the nurses." She shoved the phone back into her pocket. "Let's go."

As they both headed towards and down the elevator, Ryan carefully watched her. Her determination was a little frightening. So, he attempted some pleasantry.

"How are you and Jay doing?" he spilled, instantly regretting it. He didn't want to know.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Natalia shot back. Her stare remained forward waiting for the doors to slide open.

"I'm just making small talk, Natalia," Ryan returned. He leaned his body against the railing of the lift and crossed his arms.

Natalia clicked her tongue against her teeth in agitation. "Do you have a problem with Jay and me dating?" she accused. "Because if you do, just say it."

"Fine," he uttered under his breath. "I won't ask again."

"He makes me happy, Ryan," she barked. Finally breaking her stare down with the doors, Natalia turned to meet her focus with his. "He cares about me, he worries about me—." Her phone rang again. She silenced it again.

"So much that he needs to know where you are 24/7?" Ryan snapped, bringing his body closer to hers.

"Well, maybe that's a good thing after what happened today!"

"He's smothering you!" Ryan raised his voice. "Why can't you see that?" Just then the doors opened to people waiting in the lobby for the elevator. Natalia didn't answer, only shook her head, and walked out of the lift, leaving Ryan eyeballing a group of police.

* * *

><p>"So, the victim was doing more than just selling furniture, huh?" Molly asked, retreating over to Ryan at the receptionist desk.<p>

"Apparently," he briefly muttered. Finishing up the paperwork in front of him, Ryan set the pen down and pivoted to lean against the desk.

"Is Natalia alright?" she suddenly asked, her hand nonchalantly pointing in the direction the brunette headed towards. "I know I've only been here for a little while, but so far I've never seen her this worked up."

"Yeah," Ryan agreed. "She gets very passionate sometimes…especially when it directly affects her."

"So, are you two-?" she motioned back and forth, letting out an awkward giggle.

"What?" Ryan realized what she was implying. "No!" he quickly lied and shrugged, attempting to play it off. "Nah, of course not."

"Because the way you look at her—"

"We're just really close friends," he continued. "That's all. Besides," he gestured down the hall, "she's with…well…"

The two looked back towards one of the lab rooms where Jay was making an effort to distract Natalia from her experiment.

"That guy," Ryan finished with a snarl.

"Ah," Molly exclaimed, "Jay. Got it." Clicking her tongue, she turned back to Ryan. "And what about you?" Ryan furrowed his brows. "Are you with anyone?"

"Ah, no." He bit his bottom lip and lowered his eyes.

"Not even one of those girls you met online?" she joked.

"Oh, definitely not," he laughed. "And I wouldn't recommend it."

"Ah, freaks," Molly giggled. Ryan's laughter built with hers.

"All two of them!"

Slowly, the playful amusement died down. They shifted their postures, suddenly at a loss for words. "Well," she sighed, "I better get back to work."

"Uh, yeah," Ryan chuckled nervously. "Have fun with that," he gleamed. The awkwardly-looking smile planted on his face remained as Molly dashed off.

From down the hall, Jay caught his focus to Ryan's sightline. The intrusive man scowled at Ryan before repositioning himself to block Natalia from the CSI's view.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** So, Molly and Ryan are getting closer and closer, eh? Not my fault! It's what the show wanted, right? Ha...I might fix it. Stay around to find out.

And to ChaseROCKS: I've missed your reviews! =). So, in season 6 "Dangerous Son," we see that the show considers Ryan to have brown eyes...I've always thought Jonathan had blue eyes, though...in any case, yes, that's supposed to be Ryan's eyes in that chapter, lol.


	17. Out of Touch

**A/N:** Wonderful reviews, my loves! We're getting to that moment you're all waiting for...possibly. Remember I made you believe we would see it in this story's prequel...but then I tricked you, so... =).

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><p><strong>Chapter 16: Out of Touch<strong>

Natalia breathed heavily as relief came upon her. She did it; she solved that case. The moments from the day reeled continuously in her mind like a movie on fast forward. But the day wasn't over yet. Clarkson was still missing…

Also, she needed to apologize to someone. Natalia roamed the halls searching for Ryan. He wasn't in Trace, not in the locker room…did he go home already?

_Damn it, _she silently cursed. The brunette meandered around and bit her lower lip in aggravation. Just then, she heard his voice near, but it wasn't alone. Peering around the corner, she recognized the duo's manner- the laughter, the body language, the inability to keep their eyes focused on each other for very long…

They were flirting.

"Let's grab some." Molly suggested. "Coffee?"

Ryan shook his head from the current thoughts and realized he was staring down into box full of evidence. He was confused. Was he being asked out?

"Would you be more comfortable if I asked you over email?" the strawberry-blonde joked, a smile perched on her lips.

He then understood her remark: their talk from earlier about online dating. He smirked back. "Probably, yeah."

"I get off work at 7:00," she beamed.

Natalia's heart dropped. She didn't realize how much it would hurt to see Ryan flirting, let alone planning a date, with another woman.

Ryan briefly pondered the idea; a momentary twinge of guilt fell upon him until he remembered Natalia's blow up earlier…and Jay's obvious discontent with him.

"I'll pick you up then," he replied.

Her phone trilled loudly. _Crap! _thought Natalia. _I've been made! _She shifted her body to make it seem like she happened to be standing there, unsure if Ryan caught her or not. _Hopefully not. _"Hello?" she said answering the call.

"Do you believe me now!" Clarkson screamed from the other end. Eyes wide, Natalia determined her feelings would have to take a back burner.

* * *

><p>The coffee house hustled and bustled in its usual manner as customers bolted in and out for their own dose of poison. The carriage of laughter, though, resounded clearly above the rest.<p>

Molly looked down at the steaming liquid in her ceramic cup as she took in small gasps to calm her chuckling. "I have to admit, Ryan," she cringed, "asking you out was just a front."

Ryan's phone harmonized as it vibrated. It was Natalia…he silenced it.

"You see," she continued, her eyes shooting over suspiciously to his phone, "I've always wanted to be a CSI, and-."

More ringing. More silencing. Ryan didn't even bother to look down. _I'm busy entertaining a beautiful woman, _he decided.

Her focus shifted to his pompous expression. "And so far, the only thing standing in my way is the gun qualification. I was-." A third ring. "Are you going to get that? It might be important."

Ryan barely squinted down to the device before snapping his blue eyes back up and smiling. "I'm off the clock," he jeered. "Whatever it is, it can wait until tomorrow."

"Oh," Molly breathed. "Anyway, I was wondering if maybe you could help me pass the gun qualifications. I asked around the lab, and everyone said you were the best man for the job."

"So, this isn't…" The CSI scrunched his brows curiously, hesitant as Molly waited for him to execute the entire thought to words. "You just need help with the gun qualification…that's all?"

"I would be eternally grateful, Ryan," she pleaded. Ryan both sighed and chuckled to hide his obvious embarrassment.

"I have to admit," he confessed, leaning back into the chair and scooping up the piping coffee, "I thought you were interested in me."

The strawberry-blonde gasped in shock. "I'm so sorry," she atoned, shaking her head. "I like you, but not that way. You're not my type," Molly explained in a soft tone. "Besides, I see the way you look at her."

"Look at who?"

"The one whose call you keep silencing." Molly pointed to his cell and grinned. "You may not believe it right now, but her relationship with Jay? That won't last long, trust me."

"How do you know?" Ryan took sip of his coffee.

"Because," she replied, taking a sip herself, "I'm a woman. And we women know these kinds of things."

* * *

><p>She tried again…for maybe the fifteenth time to get a hold of the stubborn Ryan Wolfe…okay, maybe not 15 times, but it sure felt that way. Every time the sound of his voice played, Natalia internally screamed. Aggravation was an understatement.<p>

She slammed the phone down in frustration.

"Who was that?" Jay questioned. Slowly walking towards her, he carefully maneuvered a hot ceramic bowl of chicken noodle soup and a spoon. Natalia observed his motions silently as he placed the comfort food in front of her before sitting down. Her eyes trailed his movement to the couch.

Natalia climbed atop his lap, her legs spread on each side. She began embracing her lips to his aggressively. Her hand reached under the man's shirt as she caressed his fiery skin passionately, her nails sensually digging in. The kiss became more intense as Natalia tried to unbutton Jay's jeans.

She wanted this. Natalia needed this…anything to **piss** him off.

"Wait," Jay garbled and delicately pushed the brunette away. "Trust me when I say…wow. I want this," he conceded. "But I need to make sure you want this as well…or are you just upset about today?"

Natalia's focus shifted around the room as she bit the inside of her lip. "I don't know," she answered, melancholy, and lowered herself back down to the couch. "I think I need to get away," she admitted, "figure some things out, you know."

"I know," Jay smiled. "I'll wait for you."

Natalia smiled back wearily. She wasn't sure if she wanted that.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Woah...realization much? Lol, that last part takes off from my 1-shot "Just Ask the Lonely."

Anywho...r&r!


	18. Wanna Be Startin' Something

**A/N: **Sorry about taking so long to update! The play I was in ended a few weeks ago, so I had to play catch up with my life, ha! Anyway, thank you for staying with me and for the wonderful reviews! Loved them all, =).

Some good interaction between Jay and Ryan coming your way, *evil grin*

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 17: Wanna Be Startin' Something<strong>

_I knew something was going on,_ Jay grumbled mindlessly as he attempted to process the evidence before him. _The way he looks at her, his smugness when she's not looking…_okay, so he might have been imagining it, but still…

_Then why would Natalia insist on calling him 4 times and then lie to me? _Jay contemplated. Helping Natalia pack last night, he saw his chance to snoop, covertly snatching her cell and checking her call logs. It wasn't his proudest moment, but he didn't act on many of his conjectures. _She'll forgive me…or she'll never know, whichever comes first._

Now, he was faced with a weighty decision: what was he going to do about it?

A knocking from the lab's door stirred him from his possible schemes. He would have to plan more at a later time.

"Hello?" announced a muddled voice. Ryan reluctantly stepped into the room, an evidence bag in hand.

_If you're going to rectify the problem, _Molly stated firmly, _then you're gonna have to make amends with Jay first. _Ryan didn't want her to be right, but she was.

"Here is the evidence from the latest case," Ryan revealed, walking towards Jay's desk to place them down.

"Thanks," Jay murmured, not even looking up from his current task.

"Welcome," Ryan questioned more than stated. Slowly, he pivoted to retreat the way he came. Stopping, he pivoted back. "Do you know where Natalia is?" He waited for an answer, which didn't come. "I couldn't find her this morning, and she's not taking my call." He knew that was more his fault for not receiving hers at all last night.

"She took a trip with her sister," Jay loathingly explained. "She'll be back in two weeks."

"Oh," Ryan whispered. His body slumped over as he scratched his forehead. "I wonder why she didn't tell me." _Maybe if I had answered the call…_

"Why would she need to tell you?" Jay snapped and raised his head. His sudden anger inspired him to advance towards the CSI.

"Because," Ryan winced, "she's my friend. I could have at least helped her pack."

An idea came, a nasty idea that Jay knew he would regret another day. But this was not another day. This was now.

"Don't worry, 'Ry'," he sneered. "I helped her plenty." He got closer to Ryan, their eyes taunting each other, their anger building up. "And then," Jay chuckled, "she repaid me."

"Excuse me?" Ryan hissed.

"She said I'm more man than she's ever had. It was explosive."

Ryan jolted forward, his teeth grinding as Jay smiled boastfully. His hands in fists, he held his temper, slowly withdrawing from the confrontation.

No, he wasn't going to give into it.

"And I know how long you've eagerly wished to know," Jay roared after him, "and yes… she's an **animal **in bed."

A swing, a hit…Jay's nose bleeding.

The rest was a blur.

* * *

><p>Bang, bang, bang!<p>

"Who does he think he is?" Ryan muttered. Bang, bang, bang! "He doesn't know what I've been through." Bang, bang! "What I've seen. I could get rid of his body, and no one would find him." A couple more shots fired and the magazine was empty. He pulled off his protective ear-gear and began reloading.

"Ryan," chirped Molly from behind. He scarcely peered over to her eager face. "Sorry I'm late. Thank you so much for this."

"Not a problem," he uttered softly in irritation. "Anything for a friend." The protection was back on and he was shooting again. This time he didn't stop. One bullet after the other flew as Molly jumped in surprise from the distinct aggression. The magazine emptied.

"I take it your attempt to make amends with Jay didn't go smoothly," she grimaced.

"Oh, it was smooth sailing," Ryan replied sarcastically. "After I punched him, Jay's nose dripped blood with ease."

"You didn't," Molly gasped. She rolled her eyes. _Perfectly good nose damaged._ "What did he say?"

"Enough to warrant a make-over." He placed the gun down in front of him and turned to the younger technician. "No more about him. Let's get you ready for those qualifications."

"Okay," Molly spoke, her brows furrowing. "Whatever he said, Ryan…you should probably talk to Natalia first before believing it."

"Do you want my help or not?" he barked.

"I'm going." Molly departed fast to a nearby station.

Ryan gathered his things and brought them back to the front desk, his old stomping grounds. "Can I get a little help here?" he asked the man studying the supplies stashed against the back wall.

"She's right, you know," Jesse pointed out as he turned to face Ryan.

"Oh, God," Ryan groaned. "Is this a dream?"

"Does it matter?" Jesse shrugged and lay down some guns and ammo. "Anyway, that Molly girl is right. Do you really believe anything Jay has to say about his relationship with Natalia?"

"No!" Ryan countered.

"So, you punched him because of his comments?" Jesse clarified. "And not because it's a possibility they, in fact, slept together?" Ryan tightened his lips; he wasn't going to answer that. "Look, before you start believing someone you only met a couple of months ago, maybe you should ask the one person you've known for years."

An attendant trickled into the area. Ryan lowered his eyes quickly. If the workers saw him talking to no one, they would deny him access to the guns…for obvious reasons, of course.

"Am I right, Speed?"

The attendant turned around. "Oh, yeah," Tim Speedle agreed. "Oh, and thanks for getting Calleigh and Delko back together." He turned to his fellow ghoul. "A thorn in my side, I tell you."

"Oh, kind of like him?" Jesse gestured and chuckled back.

Ryan groaned and dropped his head to his hands. "Tell me how to get rid of you people!"

"Get rid of who?" Molly asked. She searched around the area but found nothing…except maybe someone on the verge of a break.

Ryan brought his head up. The apparitions disappeared. "Nothing," he stammered. Gathering the items Jesse left behind, Ryan stuttered and cleared his throat. "You ready?" He gestured towards the range and took off, leaving Molly behind.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Yay for Jesse and Tim stirring up the fun, =). Anywho, short and sweet... r&r.


	19. No More Words

**A/N:** Sorry, everyone, for the delay. It's the end of the semester, so things are getting crazy. Anyway, here you are!

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><p><strong>Chapter 18: No More Words<strong>

_So far, so good, _Ryan thought. Jay didn't seem to report him for their "miscommunication." _Now, if I can just bury myself in work, keep my head low, I'll get through the day with little confrontation…_

Looking at the substance beneath the microscope, his stomach instantly sunk. _I am so behind with these cases, _he realized. _What have I been doing to back up so much work?_

He glanced over towards the stack of reports, samples, and paperwork he needed to catch up on.

"Beating people up now, Wolfe?" Eric joked and strode on into the room.

_That's right, getting into bar fights._

"What are you talking about, Delko?" he feigned, looking up from the sample to type information into the computer adjacent to him.

"Word around the lab is that you hammered Jay Adamson to a pulp," bantered the Cuban, an elastic grin occupying most of his face.

_He didn't go to Horatio, but he's willing to spread it around…jackass._

"You know, for someone **not **interested in a one Natalia Boa Vista," Eric joked, "you sure have a funny way of showing it."

"It's just a rumor," Ryan ignored, studying the possible explanations of the substance on the computer. "That's all. And I would appreciate it if you and the rest of this hell-forsaken lab would mind their own business."

"Ryan Jonathan Wolfe," bellowed a Southern voice, "tell me it's not true."

"Oh, my God," he grumbled, his head sinking.

"You punched Jay?" Calleigh accused and placed her hands on her hips. "What were you thinking?"

"You know what he was thinking, babe," Eric interrupted. "He did it for the woman he loves."

Ryan's head began to pound as he tried his best to control his temper. This was getting old, and he was tired of it.

"That doesn't mean he should go around beating people up!" the female cried.

Maybe if he counted backwards, Ryan could contain the anger building up.

"And what makes him think this will work to win her over?" she continued.

_7…6…5…4…_

"Ryan," Calleigh finally shifted to him, "if you want Natalia to know how you feel, this is not the way to do it!"

"STOP!" Ryan shouted…loud enough for neighboring co-workers to hear. "Stop all of it! I am not in love with her!" He pushed his body away from the sample as to not contaminate it. "I was never in love with her and will never be in love with her! And frankly, what I do with my romantic life is none of your damn business!"

"Hey, Wolfe," called Walter from behind.

"WHAT?" He turned around. He had an audience. Taking a deep breath, he cooled his nerves. "Sorry, what?"

"Horatio needs you," the tall male reported.

_Damn it._

* * *

><p>Ryan thought the worst. <em>I'm going to get written up and suspended. <em>He slowly marched his dead-man walk closer and closer to the boss's office. _They'll probably order me to therapy again…_He could already see Dr. Gallagher's smug face, telling him "I told you so!"

He rattled his knuckles against the glass door. Horatio looked up from his desk and waved, signaling him to come in.

_This is it._

"Have a seat, Mr. Wolfe," the red head gestured. Ryan closed the door behind him and lowered himself to the chair. The feeling he had was all too familiar right now.

"H," Ryan quickly began, "if this is about Jay, I have to say that-."

"About Jay," Horatio cocked his head at an angle. "I'm not sure I follow."

_Oops. _"Nothing," Ryan shook his head and laughed it off. "I'm sorry, you wanted to see me?"

"Yes," the boss gradually starting, "I first wanted to recognize the hard work you've put into the lab since your return. It's not easy coming back after being shot."

_Overstatement. He apparently has not seen my work area._

"In any case, the night shift coordinator let me know that a position has been opened."

_Wait…what?_

"She wanted to keep the opening internal since it's only a temporary fill, and has expressed to me your name being brought up for it." Ryan sat mute. "It's a higher title than you have now with a much better pay. Like I said, it's only temporary, but she mentioned it could lead to a permanent position."

"And what did you say?" Ryan questioned carefully.

"I told her the team would lose out but saying you weren't right for the job would be selfish and a lie."

_Wow. _Ryan was dumbfounded. All these years he thought the red-head held resentment for hiring, and re-hiring, him, preferring to look after Calleigh and Eric instead. In the back of his mind, Ryan assumed Horatio would always compare him to Tim Speedle.

"You're holding yourself back, Mr. Wolfe," Horatio continued. "I'm holding you back," he corrected himself.

I, uh," Ryan faltered, his gaze dropping in dismay, "can I think about it?"

"Of course," Horatio replied. "Let me know."

Later that night, he listened to Natalia's voicemail greeting for the sixth time.

Then, he applied for the job.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Reviewing this chapter, I laughed at the fact that this is kinda resembling my own life right now. I've been at my job for nearly 9 years, always a temporary employee. 2 weeks ago, my boss said I need to "spread my wings and fly"...

I wrote this chapter months before that conversation with my boss...psychic? ...hmmm, maybe. =)


	20. Turn Me Loose

**A/N:** Woo! Love your reviews, people. Seriously, the comments make me smile so much. ChaseROCKS, do not even worry! I get it when the world takes you for a spin. Happens to me everyday, ha! Shout out to BlueDiamondStar, reallylove, and 1 who have been reviewing every chapter. You have more patience than I do, so thanks, =). And the rest of ya'll who've been able to review even once, thank you. Seriously.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 19: Turn Me Loose<strong>

One week later, Ryan had a first interview. A couple days later, a second interview. Then one day, he got a call from HR.

They offered him the position.

Life was good. He asked if he could break the news to his boss after recommending him for the job, to which they were fine with.

Ryan Wolfe was walking on air. He paraded through the hallway of the crime lab, excited to tell Horatio.

He only got as far as the front desk. Natalia and Jay seemed to be having an involved conversation. Ryan forgot that Natalia returned to work today. He wanted to share with her the good news then realized why he took the job in the first place.

* * *

><p>"Did you take lots of pictures?" Jay sweetly continued, hoping his questions about her vacation would stop the inevitable.<p>

"Yes," Natalia giggled softly. She stared down at the floor and gulped. The vacation with her sister made her come to terms with a lot of things, including where her heart resided. "Look, Jay…we need to talk."

Jay sighed sharply and grinned. "You're in love with him…with Ryan," he admitted.

"Yes," she affirmed, baffled.

"Are you sure you don't want to fight for this?" he questioned. Peering over the brunette, he saw the male in question staring their way.

"That wouldn't be fair to me or to you," she pointed out kindly. "I'm sorry."

The tall male smiled, one last and greatest blow to the "amazing" Ryan Wolfe coming to mind. He looked down and held a gaze to Natalia. "A good-bye kiss?" he crooned.

* * *

><p>Noticing the tension from Jay's glare, Ryan began walking again. <em>I'll break it to her gently later. <em>Then he caught their intense embrace. It was romantic, it was sensual, it was…exactly what Ryan first planned. Her mind was off of him and onto someone else. Tight lipped, he walked quietly past the room.

* * *

><p>"Goodbye," Natalia breathed and walked out.<p>

She had to find him. She had to find the man she loved.

"Ryan!" she called after him down the hall. He seemed to be walking towards Horatio's office. "I need to talk to you about something."

"Why?" he spoke bitterly and turned to meet her perplexed appearance. "You don't want to keep your precious Jay waiting, now do you?" It came off more hostile than he intended.

"Excuse me?" she snapped back. "How about 'Hi, Natalia!' or 'How was your vacation, Natalia?'"

"Just forget it," he waved and began to leave.

"What has gotten into you?" Natalia interrogated. "Do you see me judging you for spending time with that Molly girl?" Ryan turned back.

"You have no idea what you are talking about, Talia," he explained.

"Then help me understand, Ryan!" she yelled, throwing her arms to her side.

"Mr. Wolfe, Ms. Boa Vista," Horatio interrupted, "something wrong?"

"Nope," forged Natalia.

"Nothing at all," lied Ryan.

"Okay, then," commented the red-head. "We have a report of an attack in downtown Miami. I think it's linked to the recent prison outbreak."

"Horatio, I-"

"I'll go," Natalia interrupted. "Don't want to keep your precious Molly waiting, now do you?" she harshly whispered to Ryan.

"Okay, Mr. Wolfe, I need you on surveillance for Mike Darrow, Dante Kroll's last known associate," Horatio ordered. He heard the brunette's remark; he just didn't care to deal with that right now.

As the red-head and female CSI began to walk off, Ryan spoke up. "H, I needed to speak to you about something…"

"Yes, Mr. Wolfe," he whirled back towards Ryan's direction.

_They offered me the job. _Looking at Natalia's disdain expression, Ryan backed down.

"Forget it," Ryan yielded. "It can wait."

* * *

><p>Mike Darrow barely escaped jail time, Ryan landed wrong trying to chase down the man, Natalia was pissed at him… Ryan didn't like this day at all.<p>

Now he was back at the lab, attempting to help figure out where Kroll has been hiding, and apparently spending time with his "precious Molly."

They looked at the computer and discovered a possible location for the fugitive. At least something appeared to be going right. "It seems like the perfect hiding place for Dante Kroll, doesn't it?" Ryan commented. _Something I could use about now._

"It does." Molly grabbed the paper listing the results, walking back to her station.

Normally, Ryan would investigate the new information with a partner, usually Natalia. But that was completely out of the question right now, especially if he wanted to keep his ego intact. Then, the ruthless idea hit him like a truck. _Maybe Molly and I should spend even more time, together, Natalia. _Ryan's internal devilish smile couldn't have shown brighter. "Hey, why don't you come out in the field with me?" he smiled. "I could use an extra set of eyes, if you are up to it."

"Really?" Molly gleamed. _Me? Out in the field? Like a real CSI?_

"You still do target practice?"

"Every other week."

"Then you're good to go."

* * *

><p>"You took her out in the field?" Natalia confronted Ryan from behind. The secret hideout led to the belief that Dante Kroll was planning a heist at the arena. Everyone was on edge.<p>

The crowd around the duo roared as Logan Shepherd fought his great battle.

"You didn't seem too against it when I let you into the crime scene when you first started," he snapped loudly. His eyes searched around meticulously for Kroll. He had possibly shed the security uniform after hitting the arena's vault, so the team's easy visual was lost.

"That was different, Ryan!" Natalia shouted back. "I was FBI when I transferred in."

"Yeah, as the mole!"

Her mouth agape, she couldn't believe what he just said.

"That's low," she wavered.

He didn't care. Suddenly, Ryan spotted someone identical to Kroll. Ignoring all protocol, he ran after him alone…past the crowd, through the stands, down the hallway…people were gasping and shying away as Ryan lifted his weapon…until he caught up.

"Alright, alright." Ryan pointed his gun deep into Dante's back.

"Drops the bags. Drop the bags. Very good." Ryan observed the criminal attentively. His movement was deliberate and still. A smirk lightly appeared across Ryan's lips. He caught one of the most dangerous fugitives loose in Miami...by himself. "Put your hands on your head. That's it."

One, two, punch. Ryan didn't even see it begin. It was lights out before he hit the ground.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Those episodes really bugged me, ya know? Why in the hell would Molly be out in the field? And why would Ryan go after a dangerous fugitive without backup? Gah! So, I made up my own reason. In your face, CBS writers.


	21. My Prerogative

**A/N: **Sorry, loves, for getting behind on updating. I've been very busy! First, I graduated with my second AA (in theatre, no less), won "Best Supporting Actress" for the college's awards show, and finished up the months-long planning of working at Phoenix Comicon. Truly a hectic couple of months. Oh, and I was almost on the jury for a high-profile murder trial... crazy stuff.

A dedication is at the end of this chapter. I felt the update should be read first before the news...

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 20: My Prerogative<strong>

Ryan Wolfe sat quietly to himself in the break room as he watched his friends around the lab open a bottle of sparkling cider. It would have been champagne, but they were still on the clock.

The team prevented more deaths and cleared up yet another case of a missing fugitive. Only one more to go.

Walter asked earlier if Ryan cared to join in the celebration. He bowed out graciously and went looking instead for some pain medication. His previous encounter with Dante Kroll was beginning to catch up to him.

Busted lip. He hadn't felt that in a long time. Ryan winced at the touch of it. He wasn't sure what he was thinking going after a dangerous criminal alone like that…without backup. Did he think he was invincible? Or did he not care whether he lived or died?

The jury was still out on that deliberation.

At least they got the culprits. He smirked and shrugged at the thought.

"Ryan Wolfe, what were you thinking?" Natalia crooned as she entered the break room. She found him hunched over on the couch "licking his wounds". "Kroll is a trained fighter and murderer. He could have killed you."

Ryan just peered up and snared. "Why do you care?"

"Of course I care, Ryan." She sighed somberly and sat next to him. Her gentle eyes searched his battered face for all of the answers she longed for, but Ryan's callow form remained. "What's happening to us? We've been so close for so long, but it's like a wedge is forming between us."

"We're just growing apart," he deviated, something he did best-anything to get out of this conversation.

"That's not it, and you know it. You've been holding something back."

"No, I'm not Natalia."

"Yes, you are! Ever since Chad's letters, there's something you've been keeping from me!" Natalia's voice rose in agitation. _I'm tired of this! Just confess it!_

Ryan remained sedate. "I don't know what you're talking about." He stood up, advancing towards the exit. To him, the lecture was pointless; there was nothing Natalia or anyone could say to change it.

"Damn it, Ryan!" she shot up, fists clinched, "I know it was you who wrote the first letter!"

Ryan broke his stride at the threshold. _No. _His heart pounded in anxiety. This was everything he wished would never happen. He pivoted back and was greeted with an afflicted expression.

"I know about Christmas **and **Valentine's Day," Natalia continued in fiery, though her speech began to tremble. "I know everything."

Ryan stormed out. "Who told you?" he demanded, Natalia rushing after him. "Who told her!" he shouted.

The CSIs nearby, minus Horatio who was in his office, stiffened at the commotion, unsure what was happening.

"Was it you, Delko?" Ryan sneered. "Or maybe Calleigh?" He circled the area waiting for an answer. "Who else knows I sent the first letter, huh? The whole lab?"

"I didn't know," peeped Jay.

"Shut up," Ryan hissed. His eyes met with everyone's focus, not a single one showing confusion. "My God! I can't trust anyone here!"

"What do you know about trust?" Calleigh snapped.

"Babe, don't," Eric pulled her back. She wiggled out of his grasp.

"This entire time, all you've done is lie to Natalia and then make her "fall out of love" with you by having her fall **in** love with Jay!"

"WHAT?" Natalia blew. "What I do and who I fall in love with is my decision!" She scuffed, disgusted. "Truth be told, I don't even like you very much, Ryan Wolfe."

Jay let out a hearty bellow.

"Shut up!" Natalia commanded.

"Well, my plan worked, didn't it?" Ryan bolted away from the gathering and down the hall. "You're in love now, aren't you?" He threw his hands up in repulsion.

"And what makes you think you succeeded?" Natalia questioned as she trailed behind, her heels clacking against the tiled floor.

From his office, Horatio caught the interesting clamor between his workers and gently began stepping out in the hall.

"Jay told me all about your "repayment" to him for helping you." Natalia shook her head. "He told me you slept with him."

_Of course he did, jackass, _Natalia cursed. She would deal with him later.

"So, go! Fall in love and live your life just the way I intended you to!" It came out wrong, much like most of his recent conversations with the brunette.

She clutched tightly to Ryan's forearm and pulled back, her eyes a steely determination. "Look, Wolfe. Whether or not that is true is none of your business. Who I sleep with is none of your business. And now who I fall in love with is **none** of your business. You have no right to control my life. I wouldn't let Nick do it, and I certainly will not let you do it."

Ryan took in the speech carefully and noticed a tight pressure against his chest. Guilt consumed him. "You're right. I'm sorry." He pulled away and met face to face with his boss.

"H, the job. I'm accepting it."

"You're what?" Natalia cried.

The red head stammered, taken aback. "I didn't know you applied, Mr. Wolfe."

"Do you need my two week notice?"

"Uh…no."

"Thanks. I'll visit HR to finish the paperwork." He bolted off again, certain what he was doing was right. He made his way towards the elevator.

"Ryan, what the hell is going on?" Natalia questioned, once again trailing right behind. "What job? Ryan, talk to me!" This time she reached for his shoulder and spun him to her. Without a second thought, she entwined her quivering lips to his. The passion heated up at every second. Onlookers-Calleigh, Eric, Walter, even Jay-stood motionless…wide-eyed…a little uncomfortable even.

"Should we leave them alone or something?" questioned Walter.

To Ryan, the kiss was beautiful, but it was the wrong time for the wrong reason. He drew her off of him and shook his head. "This is my fault, Talia. I should have been honest with you in the beginning. I ruined it. But I'm doing something about it now."

"Ry-?"

He retreated to the stairs, turned away, and didn't look back.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **This story is officially dedicated to _Forensic Kitteh_, aka TheyAteMySanity on twitter, who, according to many of her friends posting on her wall on facebook, has unfortunately passed away. She was a devoted RaiN fan, and I'm sorry we fell out of touch. Rest peacefully.


	22. Crumblin' Down

**A/N: **Here ya go, loves! The penultimate chapter to "Cupid's Quarrel"! Enjoy, =).

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><p><strong>Chapter 21: Crumblin' Down<strong>

It had been about a month, 3 weeks to be exact, since Ryan had confronted his former teammates. The lab's shift changeover from day to night was relatively smooth, the day CSIs taking the elevator down just as Ryan took the stairs up.

The one good thing that came out of all of this was that he was getting more exercise…if anything.

He would see Molly, whose shift was later than others, every once and a while, which Ryan wasn't too concerned about. She wasn't the problem, and he had promised to help her with her qualifications. Ryan Wolfe didn't break promises.

The strawberry-blonde never pushed Ryan to explain the fallout nor did she bring it up to the team. Molly just wanted to do her job and pass the exams, not cause trouble.

So, every day, the CSIs and technicians lived their jobs day by day in an orderly fashion.

This day in particular, though, the team had run into overtime dealing with a new and grueling case. Horatio saw their dismay, Natalia's more so, as they itched to solve it. The brunette sometimes looked down at her phone to press Ryan's number. She was totally and completely pissed with him, but she missed her partner as well. Others could see the change in her demeanor as if she lost her passion for the job.

"Just call him," Calleigh would suggest. "You might have more luck with him answering your call than we did."

_No, _a stubborn Natalia would reply. _He can call when he's done with his pity party._

Calleigh, Eric, Walter and Jay meandered out of the locker room, their heads low and throbbing. Horatio ordered them home to rest and try tomorrow. Natalia called from her locker she would meet them at the elevator. Calleigh, leading them out, shuffled her sore feet to the lift and pressed the button.

The door to the stairs swung open, Ryan's eyes awkwardly meeting theirs.

An awkward standoff began. Who would speak first? No one dared to cross that line, not yet. Seconds felt like minutes, which felt like hours. Ryan slowly gulped his pride down, the most bitter pill he had swallowed.

"Hey," he gently acknowledged.

"Hey, Wolfe," Eric greeted back with a head nod.

The pause was long and uncomfortable enough. Ryan picked up his pace without another word.

The doors slid open and the CSIs straggled in. "Progress, you think?" Calleigh suggested with a smile.

"He'll come around," Walter smirked kindly, "I hope."

Jay snapped his fingers and widened his eyes. "Damn it, I forgot something in my locker," he feigned and ran back.

* * *

><p>Ryan turned the corner and his heart sank. Natalia was still collecting her things and storing away others. The air became stiff as he slowly walked to his beaten-up locker. They both wanted to say something, anything, but neither CSI wanted to be the first. Someone was going to have to swallow their guilt-ridden pride. It wasn't too awful just seconds ago for Ryan...but this moment was unavoidably different.<p>

This standoff would wait another day.

Natalia picked up her things and quickly stumbled behind Ryan to leave. She accidently pumped into him.

"Sorry," she whispered.

"My fault," he added.

And with that, she breezed past an interested Jay viewing the exchange. "See you tomorrow, Natalia." She grinned in response. "She misses you, you know," Jay spoke after his eyes followed her out. "She won't admit to it, but everyone can see it."

Ryan said nothing, just stared down the inside of his locker.

"God only knows why she's in love with you, even now. After the way you treated her-."

"You weren't an angel either," Ryan retorted.

"At least I didn't run away," Jay quipped.

"I didn't run," Ryan answered, turning from his locker to the tech. "I fixed the situation the best I could."

"By abandoning the team?"

"Look," Ryan sneered, "I'm not going to justify my actions to you." He slammed the locker shut and began to leave.

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry. It's just that…" Jay paused. Honestly, he did want to fix his own mistakes-he realized that too soon after the male CSI left. Pinching his lips, Jay searched for his words above, as if they existed on the ceiling. "I don't understand the complete history between you two," he peered back to Ryan, "but I do know that a woman like Natalia deserves an explanation."

Ryan stopped short of Jay leaning in the threshold. "I'm paying my dues for what I did, and we haven't even known each other for that long," Jay continued. "Who knows if she'll ever speak to me again outside of the job."

"Natalia can't keep a grudge for long," Ryan chuckled lightly. A bit of joy gleamed through his eyes as he reminisced the way Natalia would always deal with her "anger". She was always too nice. "It's not in her nature. She'll come around."

"And you?"

"Well, I'm, uh…paying my dues as well," he smirked. Clearing his throat, the smile faded as he resumed his walk.

"Your fear of admitting how you feel about Natalia shouldn't be the cause of destroying the friendship you two have," Jay reminded him.

Ryan knew that. Hell, he had known that since the day he found her at his hospital bedside. He had known that moments before he was shot by Chad.

He pretended to ignore the statement and headed off to interrogation.

* * *

><p>Striding up to the area, Ryan took in the sight inside. A young female snatched one tissue after the other as she attempted to hold everything in; she wasn't succeeding.<p>

"Is this the girlfriend of our victim?" Ryan asked his new partner, Jim, a taller, slinky man with short, salt-and-pepper hair. He was an older veteran of the crime lab who was content on the smaller cases; though, he treated them with the same respect as any other crime.

"Yup," he shook his head. "Poor soul."

"Don't think she could have been involved?"

"Alibi's air-tight."

"Got it," Ryan nodded and entered the room. He sat down gently in front of the young blonde. Her short locks held raggedly behind her pierced ears. She seemed to be cradling something between her fingers. "Miss Jacobsen, I'm sorry we had to bring you in again, but we have some more questions pertaining to Danny's murder." Ryan scrunched his eyes in confusion; he's used to seeing intense emotions from the victim's loved ones, but she's known about his death for a couple of days. By now, tears would have been all dried up. "I'm sorry, Miss Jacobsen, is something wrong?"

Carefully, the girlfriend placed a gold band down on the grey table. The cut was intricate and beautiful, the diamonds a tinted blue. "I started looking through Danny's things; his mom wanted to come over to claim baby pictures, a shirt or something, you know?" She sniffled and wiped away more tears. "I found this in his bed stand. He was going to propose."

Ryan sighed sorrowfully. These were the hardest cases. The mafia hits, the terrorists bombs, the serial killers…none of it compared to the agony of what could have been.

"Mr. Wolfe," she spoke softly, "do you have someone in your life? Someone you love?" Ryan didn't answer, to which she took as a "yes". "Don't let her go. This feeling of never being able to get back something you lost, it's awful."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Aw, well, that was kinda sad, ya know? Sometimes I even depress myself with the things I write. =(


	23. Faith

**A/N:** This is it! The end of it all! I would like to thank of you wonderful reviewers who held ground and continued to read despite my disappearing act. You are all crazy wonderful people. I dedicate this story to you all... =).

Below is your eye/ear candy.

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><p><strong>Chapter 22: Faith<strong>

The doorbell rang for the second time. Whoever was behind the door seemed eager for Natalia Boa Vista to answer it quickly. "Hold your horses, I'm coming!" she shouted. She was enjoying a long, hot bath with a bit of red wine, so the brunette was plenty annoyed by now. _Whoever this is, it better be important, _she silently grumbled. Her robe-wrapped body peered through the curtain before opening the door, her eyes scrunching in bewilderment. "Huh?"

The door slowly opened to a humbled Ryan Wolfe. His hands shoved in his pocket, the CSI spoke softly. "Hey, uh…can I come in?"

She stared at him, deciding. Should she? Or should the door close flat in Wolfe's face? She was plenty confused and unsure of their previous encounter from that day. Ryan all but ignored her, giving her an uncaring response when their shoulders touched in the locker room…

True, she was just as formal, but still.

"Talia?" he continued after standing at the door awkwardly.

"I'm considering," she responded coldly.

"Okay," Ryan nodded, "I deserve that."

"In," Natalia said, finally. A callous hand gestured him in sharply before tightening her robe. Natalia's hair was wrapped up, and makeup had been removed. "Let me just go change."

The male CSI nodded just as timid as before as he carefully watch the brunette walk briskly to her room. "So far, so good," he reassured himself. He was pretty sure the door would have been slammed in his face before a single word was uttered, but he seemed to have made it past the threshold. _Baby steps, _Ryan thought.

Natalia returned in a long-sleeved, low cut night shirt and short shorts. She made have been pissed at Ryan, but she wasn't dead. A little skin to set him off couldn't hurt the situation…and she could have fun at the same time. _See what you're missing?_ Natalia mentally smirked.

Ryan paused and gaped at the evening-ware. He cleared his voice and attempted to speak. "How's the team?" he feebly began, his eyes suddenly focusing and un-focusing to his surroundings. "I took a look at that case you've been working on; it's a doozy."

"Ryan, what are you doing here?" She wasn't in the mood for beating around the bush.

"I just thought I could help out, you know," Ryan continued.

"Ryan!" Natalia exclaimed.

"Okay, fine," he joked, his arms flying up as he walked back to the door. He wasn't handling this very well, and he knew it. "If you don't want my help, that's fine. I'll just leave." Natalia huffed in frustration.

"That's it?" she said harshly. "After everything that has happened, you come here expecting to act like nothing is wrong?"

_No, _he thought. Ryan pinched the bridge of his nose, praying that words would magically seep out… but nothing happened.

Natalia sighed heavily. _I guess that's it. _"Goodbye, Ryan Wolfe." She marched to the door and threw her hand to the doorknob…

…Ryan threw his hand over hers and gripped tightly.

Ryan exhaled sharply and dropped his head, his eyes closed. It was now or never. "I'm sorry… for not coming clean about the letter…for not telling you the truth about Christmas and Valentine's Day…and making you think your admirer was nothing more than a crazy stalker."

Natalia backed away from the door, her arms crossed against her chest. Her eyes traveled up the wall to the ceiling as she took in his apology, realizing it was her turn.

"I'm sorry for acting like I never knew." Natalia circled her couch and slumped down. After a moment's pause, she sat straight up and shifted her eyes directly to his. "I just don't understand why you did all of it in the first place. Why couldn't you just tell me how you felt? I thought we could tell each other anything."

"It's not that simple, Talia," Ryan groaned as his body remained stationed near the entrance. "You saw what happened between Calleigh and Delko."

"Do **not** use those two as an excuse. Tell me the truth, Ryan. The honest-to-God truth."

_The truth? _He searched his mind, his heart…what was holding Ryan Wolfe back from being honest with the ones closest to him?

He inhaled, tempered himself, and found a spot close to the brunette. "It has been so hard trying to fit into this team. Some days I, uh… I feel like I take steps forward and then instantly fuck it up and I have to retreat. I'm tired of always being the suspected one or being the center of the lab's rumors. The media leak, the gambling, Horatio's death, the diamonds-."

"What does this have to do with the letters, Ry?"

Ryan stood up and paced, his scruffy hands running through his hair. "If word started getting around that I fell for you, my business would be the lab's business…again."

"I know what it feels like for people to suspect you," she reminded him.

"Everyone forgave you, Natalia. They understood you did what you had to do. It's not the same."

"Not everyone forgave me, Ryan."

He stopped and realized the fact. Staring back at her, he continued. "I remained anonymous about the Christmas present because I didn't want to take any credit. I wrote the love letter because I couldn't handle seeing you so upset. And I was going to admit to it, to everything, but then Chad started stalking you and…not only would I be labeled a suspect, I would be the joke….again."

"But we found out it was Chad. Why not come clean then? Why put me through all of that?"

"I saw how you were affected by it. I couldn't let you get hurt again."

"What hurt me is that you couldn't trust me with all of this. These are my feelings, too, you know."

"I understand that now, believe me." A silence fell between them.

"You really did hurt me, you know," Natalia sighed.

Ryan crossed his arms and exhaled. "Then tell me: how do I fix this? How do I make it up to you?"

The brunette bit her lower lip and shook her head skeptically. "I don't know," she joked. "I don't think there's anything you can do. We're just a lost cause, you and me."

"Natalia-."

"We are doomed to have this haunt us forever."

"I'm serious-."

"We'll just have to keep walking around the lab like we don't exist." Natalia then threw her arms up dramatically. "Our jobs will be affected; criminals will be on the streets! And let's not talk about our reputations. All because of a lover's quarrel." She clicked her tongue sarcastically.

"Talia!" he chuckled, "Come on!"

She gazed at the loveable man, clutched a pillow nearby, and threw it at him. Ryan threw his arms up defensively and huffed. "Don't you ever hurt me like that again, Ryan Wolfe!" He was right before; Natalia Boa Vista couldn't hold a grudge.

"Don't throw a pillow at me again!" he retorted in laughter.

"Or what?" she teased.

Ryan pounced on the brunette, laying her against the bed of the couch, and instantly began tickling her. "Give up?" he asked as she gasped between her giggles.

"Never!" she bellowed and pulled his head down into an emotional embrace. This time, he accepted it affectionately.

"Finally!" cheered Jesse and Speedle from the door. "Success!" Their fists met in satisfaction.

Ryan grumbled and, without breaking his grasp from Natalia, reached for a pillow and propelled it through the ghosts. They vanished with a smile.

A giggle escaped from Natalia's lips, and the CSIs continued their passionate kiss. _Finally, _she thought.

…

And so the CSIs of the Miami-Dade Crime Lab fell back into their comfortable stride. Ryan didn't return to the day shift right away because of his commitment to his new position. Though, when the temporary job came to an end, he requested to rejoin the team.

Ryan and Natalia never explained their reconciliation to anyone neither did they implicate a relationship had, indeed, started.

That's another story.

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><p><strong>AN:** Gasp! What does that mean? Another fanfiction, perhaps? I mean, I have an idea in mind, but I will not guarantee it until I actually find the time for it. Like I said up top, thank you, thank you, thank you all for sticking by and reading through this story's experiences...some bumpy, some not. It was a wonderful journey, and I am proud of what I've published.

I shall be on the lookout for some great stories from you all!

Cheers!


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